I moved to Leith six months ago, but it's taken me ages to convert to this bonus
I was resistant to this mode of transport at first
I am a late adopter and refusenik.
The more people try to persuade me to try something, the less I want to do it. Apparently, it’s a classic Generation X trait.
The trams are a good case in point. Since I moved to Leith six months ago, I’ve been strangely set against them.
In the same way that I’m proud because I haven’t had Covid or eaten a KFC, I was quite pleased that, since their introduction back in 2014, I have only used the trams twice, to get to and from the airport on a mini-break to Paris.
Apart from that, I have never been aboard. I feel as if I’m a Victorian, who still insists on my plumed horse and carriage, while everyone else is in a motor car. But I like it that way. Let me ride my penny farthing, while you all speed past on those silly and tiny pink Voi electric bikes.
In contrast, my husband gets them to work on his office days twice a week. As a new devotee, he had become very annoying whenever we were on the bus together.
“If we had got the tram, we would’ve been there by now,” was becoming one of his many catchphrases.
Fair enough. I can see why. The traffic lights are ridiculous on the way up Leith Walk. There’s about 47 sets, with six minutes or so to wait at each of them, and the tram seems to dodge some of these stops. It’s above my pay grade and bandwidth to understand how this system works.
Anyway, apart from walking, buses have long been my only way around town. We have no car, since a bin lorry hit our old banger and wrote it off last year.
While, my 20-year-old bike is in the shed, with wheels as flat as drop scones and spiderwebs woven between the spokes. I haven’t seen my helmet since we moved house.
The flying skateboard that I’ve dreamed of hasn’t been invented yet. Public transport it is.
Still, I was resistant towards the newer-fangled vehicles, mainly because I don’t like that you have to tap off, as well as on. It’s also worth noting that they check your card when you’re on board, which means there are more taps overall than a Fred Astaire film. I was sure that I’d forget the last step and end up being charged the whole £7.50 fee to the airport. Apparently, that can happen.
Anyway, something changed my mind recently. I had to go to St Andrew Square, and there’s a tram stop right there, so I thought I’d be brave and give it a whirl. Otherwise, I’d have to get off at the Waverley Steps bus stop, which is arguably the most hectic pile-up in the city. I don’t want to be subsumed by wheelie suitcases or accidentally syphoned into the station.
My husband was so proud that I’d put on my big girl pants. I thought he might buy me a card, with the words “Congratulations on your first tram ride” on it.
He briefed me on the tapping thing, and revealed the insider intelligence that you don’t have to press the flashing green light buttons to open the doors. They’re just for show. Ignore them. The doors open, whatever you do. Only amateurs use them.
My goodness. My life really is so boring that I got a cheap thrill on my (almost) virgin flight.
As I approached the Foot of Leith stop for boarding, and the bells did their cheery “clang clang” chime, it was thrilling.
On board, I love how smooth it is, warm and soporific. I was nearly asleep by Elm Row.
As instructed, I proudly waved my bank card all over the strange black box - not sure which bit I was actually aiming for - that the surprisingly cheery conductors carry.
Then I clutched my debit in my hand, muttering “remember to tap off” under my breath.
While buses are dark inside, like the recesses of a cupboard, trams are bright, so you can actually see your fellow passengers.
Also, it made me very happy not to have to go upstairs, or find a pokey spare seat at the back.
However, the best thing of all, apart from how it leaves all the buses for dust as it glides along The Walk like a buttered eel, is the disembarking bit. Ever since lockdown, bus drivers have been doing the full rodeo experience, I am so bored of being shaken like a Polaroid picture. I used to quite enjoy the challenge to stay standing and alive, without clattering head first down the stairs, but now I find it offensive.
You don’t have to take your life in your hands on the trams. The vehicle just glides into port, and you step off, unruffled, unbruised and spectacles intact.
The other thing I’m enjoying is the little islands at stops. As a resident since forever, I’ve pounded every pavement in the city, but these are fresh new Rich-Tea-coloured concrete skerries, where you can observe tourists arguing about which direction they’re supposed to be going. There are only two destinations, Heaven or Las Vegas. I joke, it’s Newhaven or the Airport. As easy as that.
It may have taken a while, but now I am converted. And I haven’t forgotten to tap off yet.
Now, I need to get to grips with those silly Voi e-bikes.
Read more: “I moved to Leith two months ago, and this is what I've learnt about Edinburgh's 'coolest' area”
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