How Kemi Badenoch revealed she has the heart of a romantic poet

Arise, brave Britannia, from your slumbers! Our nation, nay, the world, is in desperate need of your wisdom, your tender heart and your majesty.

We thought we should add our voice to a most earnest call from Conservative leader Kemi Badenoch for her party to be renewed and reformed. For, as she made clear, the stakes could hardly be higher.

“If we throw this opportunity away, because of anger, or self-doubt, or weakness, our country and all of Western civilisation will be lost,” she cried. What’s more, she added it was “fiscal weakness, not just war, that led to the decline of the Roman Empire”. Pray, dear reader, that Badenoch will become a modern-day Horatius to stand steadfastly on the bridge in defence of everything we hold dear.

Conservative leader Kemi Badenoch warned about the fall of Western civilisation as she urged her party to reform itself (Picture: Jordan Pettitt) | PA

Of course, there may be a few small-minded cynics who suggest this is comically overblown. Others may quip “what have the Tories ever done for us?”

But we find ourselves overcome by even the thought of such wretches who clearly lack the heart of a romantic poet (move downstage right, pretend to faint).