A school that banned kids from playing tig in the playground insisted that its new policy doesn't mean all touching is prohibited - because children can still CLAP.
It said it was moved to stop children playing the popular game after "a few incidents" caused kids to "get upset".
A spokesman for Rudyard Kipling Primary School said: "We want to make sure the playground is a happy, safe and calm place where everyone can enjoy their lunchtime running around and getting the exercise we know is important to them.
"With the full support of our staff and our Parents Teachers and Friends Association, we have reminded the children of our 'Gentle Hands' rule during break and lunchtimes.
"This is because last half term we had a few incidents involving rough play and play fighting that were causing children to get upset.
"'Gentle Hands' simply means playing games outside that do not need to be overly physical and risk hurting or upsetting other children.
"The children are of course allowed to hold hands and play their own games with friends should they wish to.
"As part of 'Gentle Hands' we have shown the children a number of new games they can play. The children are already having lots of fun playing these new games.
"There is also a lunchtime football club, as well as basketball and cricket being played in the Key Stage 2 playground which follows our 'Gentle Hands' rule.
"Just to be clear, 'Gentle Hands' does not mean 'no touching'.
"As a school we do our best to listen to the views of our pupils, parents and carers.
"We recognise that not all of the children fully understood our 'Gentle Hands' rule. So we have explained it again to all children in assembly this morning."
But locals are unimpressed with the school's new policy.
One person who did not give their name, said: "Wait seriously... Tag? Are you for real? Get over it."
A spokesman for the Health and Safety Executive made clear that there are no specific laws or regulations in place to stop kids playing rough in the playground, but declined to comment on the specifics of the Rudyard Kipling case.