There's been a … stepping down

SCRIPTS of the returning TV detective series Taggart are jealously guarded but we have obtained this snippet.

DI Robbie Ross: Sir, we've found another body.

DCI Matt Burke: Don't tell me. West Dumbarton Council.

DS Jackie Reid: No, sir. In the doorway of Strathclyde Partnership for Transport. Third in as many days. All big cheeses.

DCI Burke: Could be a serial killer. Cause of death?

DI Ross: The report on the latest one says "stepped down". But by the facial expression I'd say it was much worse.

DCI Burke: And the others?

DS Reid: First body was a bullet to the back of the head, sir. Fired from the direction of Glasgow City Council. The other's too messy to say. Shall we pull in Steven Purcell? He's holding the smoking gun.

DCI Burke: Any other clues?

DI Ross: There's a lot of receipts on the corpses – first class air tickets to exotic places, the stub of a Rangers v Zenit St Petersburg ticket …

DS Reid: It's worse, sir. Rangers lost.

DI Ross: There's something else. There's another team on the case, sir.

DCI Burke: Spit it oot. Who?

(Dramatic pause. Loud music.)

DI Ross:Er … Audit Scotland.

DCI Burke: Aw, no! Useless bunch of paper chasing ****bags! We'll never get a look-in now.