Talk of the Town: Windfarm policy is a load of hot air

THERE'S no beating about the bush with the UK Independence Party - especially when it comes to wind farms.

The party's manifesto for the Holyrood elections promises: "We will repeal the Climate Change (Scotland) Act, which is pointlessly wrecking our world-famous landscape with wastefully-subsidised, useless, bird-killing wind farms." And just to make their feelings quite clear, they further pledge: "We will end all subsidies to monstrous, climate-irrelevant, cost-ineffective wind farms."

However, UKIP deputy leader Lord Christopher Monckton admitted the party was unlikely to win any seats. Pretending they were about to sweep to power, he said, "would be silly".

Calendar has too much tackle for rugby star

WHEN Edinburgh Rugby players undertook a semi-nude photoshoot for their annual charity calendar, little did they realise how the exercise could come back to bite some of them on the, er, bum.

Centre James King, for example, presented a copy of the calendar to his mum and all seemed to be well until April's change of page last week brought a picture of an 18st 10lb colleague into view.

"Regretting getting mum the Edinburgh Rugby calendar," wrote King on Twitter, before adding: "Walked into the kitchen to see a naked Geoff Cross! Why does it have to be April?"

Ballet better than an iPod

MOST 12-year-olds would not have to think twice when offered an iPod for Christmas.

But Northfield youngster Luke Watson instead plumped for a trip to the ballet to see one of his heroes.

The pupil at the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama was rewarded by meeting Cuban dancer Carlos Acosta.

His mother Angela, who organised the trip to London's Royal Opera House, said: "There aren't many 12-year-olds who would swap an iPod for something like this. He got a tap on the shoulder after the show and asked if he wanted to meet Carlos. It really was a huge thing for him."

Misspelt adventures

Shoppers have been scoffing at Tesco after an advert for a fun fair at the Colinton branch misspelt the suburb's name. It invited locals to enjoy a day out in "Collington".

One shopper said the store was a "laughing stock" after workmen turned up to correct the advert - but left with the sign still reading "Collinton".

Tesco insisted the sign was the responsibility of the fun fair's organisers.