Talk of the Town: Try and find rugby cup's phantom team

BOROUGHMUIR are in the quarter-finals of the Scottish under-18 rugby cup having been given a walkover by the competition's phantom team.

Having won their first two ties, Boroughmuir then contacted scheduled third round opponents Alloa to be told that not only had they not entered but they didn't have an under-18 team.

Says a source: "The SRU entered Alloa without telling them and when two sets of rivals withdrew they were automatically put through to the next round until, eventually, they came up against a team that actually wanted to play."

While the SRU insists the number of youth players stands at 20,000, some might wonder if figures are being inflated by imaginary teams!

Did you hear the one about the taxi driver hating trams?

IT'S no secret that many of the city's taxi drivers can, at times, become a cliche of themselves. The price of petrol goes up, you don't hear the end of it until you vacate the black cab; a road is closed and they moan about the traffic being backed up on neighbouring streets.

But they are never more in their element than when they talk about the trams. But we learn that some drivers have a sense of humour about their renowned dislike of the trams.

One asked the other day, during a journey through the "organised chaos" of Haymarket: "Have you ever seen that sketch by Michael McIntyre where he talks about the taxi drivers always going on about the trams? That's funny that."

It seems the irony isn't lost on them and, as a bonus, they've found a new topic to add to their repertoire.

Donald's view from the top

FORMER city council leader Donald Anderson liked nothing better than the monthly debates of full council in the City Chambers.

He made his first return to the main chamber for a recent meeting. Hidden away in the upstairs public gallery, Mr Anderson – now a director of public affairs firm PPS – was overseeing the outcome of a report on the Edinburgh City Local Plan for one of his housing developer clients.

He admitted afterwards that it was strange not to be in the midst of the action. However, it was a fairly sedate affair compared to some of the meetings he'll remember, lasting a mere two-and-a-half hours.

Diner's expensive Order

BY ANYONE'S standards, it's a lot to pay for a fizzy drink and a good read.

One diner at the Prestonfield House Burns Supper, in aid of Radio Forth's Cash for Kids appeal, forked out 2,500 for a first edition, signed copy of JK Rowling's The Order of the Phoenix, while another coughed up 100 for a packet of Creamola Foam.

The generous bidders helped raise 20,000 for the cause.