Talk of the Town: Stop me if you've heard this one...

AHEAD of the Fringe, word has got out that a firm of lawyers is getting heavy with suspected joke-blaggers.

The legal row follows an alleged flurry of borrowings by Keith Chegwin, accused of lifting the material of Milton Jones, Lee Mack and Jimmy Carr, among others. Although the former children's TV presenter protests his innocence, the group insist they know their own jokes.

Philippa Montgomerie, a partner at DLA Piper's Intellectual Property group, said that similarly scorned comics could even seek an injunction to prevent a "rival comedian" performing specific jokes.

Comics planning to use the line "Have you heard the one about the... " should beware of a heckler shouting back "I certainly have - I wrote it."

Modern arrrr-t grows on gallery's workers

STRANGE sights at the Scottish National Gallery of Modern Art yesterday, when every member of staff sported a pirate's beard.

More than a dozen gallery attendants and other staff at the Edinburgh gallery put on the "big, black and bushy" pirate beards, as part of artist Peter Liversidge's "50 Proposals for 50 days". Each day over the course of 50 days, visitors will encounter a new note with Liversidge's proposal for the day.

It seems the staff like their face fur. Simon Groom, director of modern and contemporary art at the National Galleries of Scotland, said: "Far from getting in the way, I think some may not want to give their beard up at the end of the day"

A waspish Welsh diva

WITH the Kings of Leon curtailing a US gig due to messy pigeons, they ought to take a lesson from Welsh opera star Katherine Jenkins.

During a rehearsal for her show at the Usher Hall on Saturday, she had a slight problem, but took it all in her stride.

She later told fans: "A wasp flew into my mouth mid-note and stayed there. I had to pull it out with my fingers."

Herring's loyalty is fishy

AS comedian Richard Herring prepares for his 19th Fringe show, he offers a solution to the perennial problem of high city rents for visiting performers - some kind of loyalty scheme.

He writes: "I always think that it might be nice if Edinburgh Council showed some gratitude to the veteran performers who keep coming back every year and thus help to boost the economy of this city by maybe providing free accommodation (after you've done 15 Fringes maybe - it shouldn't be for any old fly-by-night riff-raff)" or at least a parking pass. Or maybe a voucher for a free cup of coffee."