Talk of the Town: No standing ovation for showman Dundas

Except for Lib Dem city centre councillor Charles Dundas who, as a "friend" of the Holyrood Amateur Theatrical Society since 2005, prefers the real thing.

"There's a bit of the show-off in any politician," he said. "It is all about performance in this job, but I'm very committed to Hats and they've come on leaps and bounds in recent years."

However, Cllr Dundas' efforts haven't always met with critical acclaim. He was recently given the job of entertaining the audience at the Hats Winter Show and was given a less than favourable write-up by Evening News critic Thom Dibdin.

"Overblown, unfunny and downright inept," he said. "He seems to think that the whole evening has been organised for his own benefit."

Let's hope he doesn't ever get such a savage review of his performance in the City Chambers.

Motherwell food staff fail to mind their pies and queues

HUNGRY Jambos at Fir Park to watch Hearts' 1-0 League Cup semi-final defeat to St Mirren learnt the hard way that they do things differently in Motherwell.

Supporters queuing for their half-time feed in the line for the pie shop marked "Entrance" were surprised to be turned away and overlooked in favour of those in the "Exit" line.

When questioned by irate fans, a shop worker explained, "That's Motherwell fir ye!". The situation was so bad that one supporter reported having his pie and Bovril stolen while hunting for the brown sauce.

He's on his way . .

TIMES are tough, even for rock and roll stars it seems. Spotted yesterday on a number 10 Lothian Bus was none other than one of The Proclaimers.

Unfortunately, our spotter was not sufficiently star-struck to be able to tell which one. All we can say for sure is that he got on at Home Street, was carrying a black sports bag, and continued along Gilmour Place.

Any further sightings, let us know!

One from the memory bank

THIS weekend's visit to Murrayfield by France's rugby team brings back memories of another occasion "Les Tricolores" opened the Six (or Five as it previously was) Nations in Edinburgh.

The 1986 clash coincided with the international debuts of the Hastings brothers. While Gavin scored all Scotland's points in an 18-17 win, Scott was equally dead-eyed at the post-match banquet where, in a bout of typical rugby "high jinks", he threw a stuffed tomato which happened to hit the then chief executive of sponsors Royal Bank square on the chest and splattered over his dinner suit.

They always did say Scott was ahead of his time, as many victims of the credit crunch would surely testify today!