Don’t bank on it

On A visit last Monday to my local branch of the building society where I have a current account, I inquired why my regular monthly pension receipts had not been credited, prompting the following dialogue: “That’s because the funds haven’t come through”; “Why not?”; “Because of the bank holiday”; “What bank holiday?”; “Today”; “But the banks are open – I’ve just been to the one next door”; “Yes, but it’s the English bank holiday, affecting the sources of your payments”; “So will the reverse situation apply four weeks from now on the Scottish bank holiday?” “Yes”; “Are the Bourse, the Fed and the ECB aware of this?”

As it was profitless to pursue, I called in at the adjoining bank, to pay in a cheque, being reminded it would not be cleared until after “five working days”, whereupon I asked how long it had taken them to debit the payer’s account, suggesting, “No more than five working minutes?” Equally profitless to pursue…

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Marshall Place