‘You’re ashamed, totally naked’: How one rough sleeper got his life back – Alasdair Bennett

Love, kindness and compassion can play an important part in helping rough sleepers to overcome barriers created by society that keep them on the cold, hard street, writes Alasdair Bennett.

When you have no home to spend the night, 'hope gets taken away from you'

“Do you know how much it takes to put your backside on Princes Street and say ‘here I am’ to the whole world? No one wants to do that! You’re totally exposed. It’s the most humiliating, degrading thing anyone could go through. You’re ashamed. You’re totally naked.”

John is one of way too many people caught in this predicament in Scotland today. “I was in a really bad place, I was six-and-a-half stone. Eventually I cut ties with every relationship; my family, my kids. In the end I was walking around town with a sleeping bag, totally lost. I had nowhere to go.” In 2018-19, there were officially 29,894 households in Scotland assessed as homeless, or threatened with homelessness. That’s an average of 575 individuals and families every week.

Rough sleeping is the most extreme form of homelessness within these figures, involving people having no roof and ‘bedding down’ in the open air or in places not designed for habitation such as park benches, cemeteries, bus shelters and doorways. Some people sleeping rough, as John did, appear in the official numbers but others do not. Bethany’s Care Shelter in Edinburgh sees over 20 new individuals a week in need of overnight shelter and support, who would be sleeping rough otherwise – more than 700 unique individuals over the Care Shelter’s 32 weeks of operation each year. Winter can be a particularly difficult time for people sleeping rough. It is life-threatening at any time of year, but in the coldest months the risk involved rises exponentially.

Johnsays, “You have nowhere to go and you see everyone passing you going somewhere. You know they’re going to a home, a family, but you don’t have that. Where do I fit in amongst all that? The freezing cold gets into your bones. Hope gets taken away from you. I’ve been through like eight, nine rehabilitation centres, psychiatrists... No one got near me, I didn’t know how to let people in. For three decades I was basically sedated, didn’t even know what was going on.”

One day John felt drawn to a residential support centre, the Bethany Christian Centre. Bethany operates a wide range of services in partnership with multiple charities, churches, local authorities, health services, businesses and national government.

‘I learned to trust people’

From seeking to prevent homelessness in the first place, to providing wraparound support for people to maintain their own homes, they also offer a wide range of crisis intervention to support people at their point of need. “I didn’t even have a change of clothes,” says John. “The staff took me to one of the shops and got me a change of clothes and underwear. There was a peace at the centre – I just felt safe. I had the support, I had love, care and people around me who didn’t judge. I was healed in there.”

John’s life has changed; he has now moved into his own flat provided and supported by Bethany Homes.

He tells the people who supported him at the centre, “You guys, you invested time in me. That’s where it started. That’s where I learned to open up. That’s where I learned to trust people. That’s how I learned it was ok to be upset and grieve for my family. I got absolutely amazing support in there. Support is everything.”

There are so many systemic barriers in society that once a person has ended up on that cold hard street, the damage that took them there, coupled with the ongoing trauma of surviving on high alert in a harsh environment, means that despair closes in and there can seem no way out.

We must all do more

Yet time after time, I have witnessed the life-changing power of love in action, sincere love expressed in meaningful and genuine connection. The power of kindness sows hope into despairing hearts and brings beauty from the ashes.

John now uses his own story to help other people. He has a job working as an outreach support worker for a local charity, is a leader in his church and volunteers with a prison ministries service. He is passionate about seeing others lifted out of despair.

John was able to find warmth and healing thanks to his time with Bethany Christian Trust.

Sadly there are many others like John cold and alone, who desperately need a place where they can get the right support and opportunities. Together we must all do more to support people in desperate need. Let us take every opportunity to show kindness to one another and to our fellow man and woman, before, during and after the kind of crisis that John faced.

Love never gives up. Love always hopes.

Alasdair Bennett is chief executive of the Bethany Christian Trust. Established in 1983, the trust supports almost 7,000 people each year across Scotland.

Bethany provides support services and accommodation for people who are at risk of becoming homeless, people who are currently homeless, and people who have been homeless but now have their own home. More information can be found at www.bethanychristiantrust.com