On Sunday in the next street, an ever-so reasonable chap I’ve come across before burst out his front door to tell me he wouldn’t wipe his arse with my leaflets.
Representing the Conservative Party these days means there is little middle ground and those of us at the sharp end as the latest drama unfolds in Westminster just have to get on with it.
Barely had Ian Blackford stomped out the Commons and Boris Johnson gone to Portcullis House to address rebellious Conservative MPs, when I headed over to Northfield to stick election leaflets through doors.
It has now got to the stage that the latest revelations, blunders, U-turns, accusations and bad headlines from Westminster are so frequent that they are losing their currency.
With his back against the wall, using parliamentary privilege to make allegations against the Labour leader widely accepted as false is just another line in the extraordinary Boris Johnson saga which has driven Ruth Davidson literally to tears.
With leaked polling showing a third of Scottish Labour voters support independence, the Scottish Conservative Party is the only solid opposition to the SNP and independence there is, so we can’t indulge ourselves by stropping out like the traitorous MP Christian Wakeford.
Would we be in a better position had Boris Johnson behaved like a statesman and set an example of which to be proud? Of course, but then he wouldn’t be Boris Johnson.
Who knows what Prime Minister’s Questions will throw up today; more spleen-venting, more finger-pointing, more last-chance saloonery, but we carry on, waiting for the police report, and for signs that everything has changed under the new Office of the Prime Minister. Until the next episode.
“I can’t go on like this,” said Estragon. “That’s what you think,” said Vladimir.
“If we parted? That might be better for us,” said Estragon.
“We’ll hang ourselves tomorrow,” said Vladimir. “Unless Godot comes.”
Who knows if a Godot will arrive, but Scottish Conservatives can only wait. Like Samuel Becket’s characters and unlike Wakeford, we do not move.
John McLellan is a Conservative councillor in Edinburgh