Leader: Mirror, mirror on the wall… shut up!

YOU crawl out of bed, fumble your way to the bathroom, switch on the light and look in the mirror. You may not be too happy with what you see, and you may have reason not to be.

Or you may be delighted by the visage staring back to you. Whichever it is, the judgment is yours,

But what would happen if, once you presented yourself in front of the glass, it was able to talk back to you. Far-fetched? Not at all, says one manufacturer. In the bathroom of the future, the mirror will be able to tell you if, say, you are not putting on your make-up properly, or combing your hair badly.

Would it stop there? What if it were even worse than that, and the mirror acquired HAL-style intelligence and Simon Cowell-style sarcasm?

Just imagine the comments. “What do you look like this morning?” “Have you seen the bags under your eyes?” “So how much did you have to drink last night?”

And if you were tempted, like the Queen in Snow White, to ask, “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all?” What would the reply be from the technological bathroom wonder? “Not you anyway, you’re well past it. And since you asked, it’s George Clooney/Christina Hendricks.” Talking mirrors are a fun idea, but they will never catch on.