Juliet Dunlop: Reflective thoughts on not worrying about one’s image

Most of us probably swing somewhere between, depending on lighting. And let’s face it, checking your appearance is a necessary evil, especially when it’s a great big spot or a wrinkle you hadn’t noticed before that’s staring defiantly back at you.

No, it’s not vanity that makes us gaze at our reflection, it’s the thought of being judged, and pointed at in the street by strangers (or is that just me?) And, anyway, how can it be wrong to glance in the mirror of a morning if it means children don’t cower in the street or the queue at the bus stop doesn’t break into spontaneous laughter? “Egg on her face – again!”

Unless, of course, you’re a paid-up member of the bag-lady/bin-raker school of grooming and you just don’t give a damn. This probably means you count checking for stray cornflakes on the side of your face or clapping down prongs of hair that could pick up Radio 3, as tantamount to a manicure, pedicure, blow-dry and full body wax all rolled into one.

No, a quick check in the mirror is no bad thing in my book, but apparently we’re all looking at ourselves a bit too often, or at least more often than is good for us. To cut a long story short, we’re self-obsessed and looks-obsessed and living in a world where no-one ever ages and Botox is good for you. Mirror, mirror on the wall, who has the smoothest forehead of them all?

So, what’s the answer? Simple – don’t look in the mirror. And avoid all reflective surfaces: shop windows, ponds, spoons, pots and pans, car bonnets, computer screens and lifts should all be given a wide berth. Remember poor old Narcissus? He only had a pool of water to stare into, and look at what happened to him. It’s time to step away from the looking-glass before you too die miserable and alone.

Leading the revolt are the women of America, where a small group of brave souls have decided to abstain from looking at their reflections from anything from a week to a year – yes, a whole year of facing strangers with, chances are, a dirty face, broccoli stuck in your teeth and matted hair.

It’s called “mirror fasting”. New York beauty blogger Autumn Whitefield-Madrano, exhausted by the pressure of trying to look good, explains: “I’d become aware that I had a mirror face. Whenever I saw my reflection I’d open my eyes a little wider, suck in my cheeks a little and tip my chin down in an effort to make myself look more like I wanted to. It made me feel really vain.”

Poor Autumn. All that worry really isn’t good for the complexion but one, mirror-free month later, she had a spring in her step. “I was surprised at how quickly I stopped worrying about how I looked, and if I wasn’t thinking about it, I assumed no-one else was either, which is actually true.”

Inspired by Autumn’s devil-may-care attitude, I joined my American sisters. I threw a towel over the bathroom mirror, hung a coat over the one in the hall and hid my trusty little hand mirror in the nearest drawer. Putting in contact lenses was a breeze, applying some make-up only slightly tricky and doing something with my hair almost impossible, but that’s the norm.

The key thing to note here is, I couldn’t check any of my work. According to Autumn and her followers, this was the point at which I should have felt liberated and empowered. Set free from the tyranny of grooming and  self-loathing, I left the house. Suddenly a rainbow appeared, bird-song pierced the air, all the traffic lights flashed green. It was all spoiled, of course, when my friend pointed out that I had pen on my face and glitter in my hair.

Who knew writing a birthday card could be so messy? Thanks, Autumn.