John Gibson: Caldo was all charm, I’m jesting!

Boot-faced Calderwood was never the most communicative of chaps. Kept his old school tie in the drawer. Which charm school, you’re asking.

If you’re writing that about Calderwood, you’re thinking, what will you say about Rod Petrie when he goes? Blethers! Rod and I have never exchanged a cross word.

Heavens, we sit real close in the stand at Easter Road. Within hailing distance. Love each other to bits, as Rod will confirm.

Altogether now . . . glory, glory to the Hibees!

From retail to retirement

Talking shop. Three million people are employed in retail, one of the largest employers in the UK, second only to the government.

Have you ever wondered where they go, what they do, how they exist once they retire?

Can’t say I have. Until now. Gordon Drummond, Harvey Nicks boss, enlightens me saying there is such an organisation, a charity called retailtrust, that cares for retailers around retirement.

The residential care home is at Newton Mearns, Glasgow, ring 0141 639 4343.

There’s a free helpline 0808 801 0808, open nearly all hours and I trust they’re all smiling. Some can be a tad boot-faced at the counter.

Grab a pew for a decent view

Pushed for finance. St Michael’s Kirk at Inveresk – Musselburgh’s posh, including Clarissa, live there – are having a film show tomorrow night. Tickets at the door, starts 7pm.

It will be worth grabbing a pew for Derek Cameron’s Dominion, Ian Rintoul’s 50-minute tribute to much-missed Derek, who died this year.

Says Ian: “I filmed it three years ago and Derek was chuffed. I’ve since had it screened in countless venues.

“I hope it raises money for St Michael’s. Everybody tells me it’s a church of considerable beauty.”