Janet Christie: Having a breakdown

Youngest and I are waiting on the hard shoulder for a tow truck. She’s commandeered my hoodie

She pulls it tighter around her and takes a massive bite of her cupcake. She’s enjoying this. Then her face darkens.

“Oh no, here’s a man coming to tell us off.” She hides behind me. Someone has parked and is walking quickly towards us.

“It’s ok. If he starts any trouble I’ll kick him.” I say.

We brace ourselves.

But he wants to help and insists on a jump-start attempt so I push and we kerrang along. Youngest Child laughs from the hard shoulder. Hope she chokes.

We give up, and wave off the man.

“He was nice. The sort of man you should go out with.”

It’s back to waiting for the tow truck as we watch irate drivers park behind our stationary vehicle and peep their horns.

“God they’re stupid,” says Youngest.

Then the biggest monster tow truck I’ve ever seen appears.

“Oh! We’re going to get to sit up there in that huge truck!” squeaks Youngest.

We’re delivered home with our car and remaining shopping and Youngest gives the driver a cupcake.

“He was nice. The sort of man you should go out with.”

That night in bed she sighs. “This has been the best day of my life.”