David Scott: talking only option for depression

I left my day job to be a freelance photographer one year ago this week. My reasons for taking the plunge into self-employment can be traced back three months earlier to July 2012 when I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression brought on by stress.

Alt-J plat the King Tuts Wah Wah Hut Tent at T in the Park 2013. Picture: David P Scott

I’d known for over a decade that all was not quite what it should be but always put it to the back of my mind. After several periods of unemployment I had taken a job in a call centre for a high street bank. I found the environment stifling, unforgiving and dehumanizing. A square peg in a round hole, eventually I broke down.

In the weeks leading up to this point I had begun to realise I couldn’t ignore this ‘thing’ any longer and actually resolved to make an appointment with the doctor during lunch the day everything fell apart. I never made it that far though, walking out of the office in a state half an hour into my shift.

While these events were quite traumatic at the time, especially for those around me, with my diagnosis I did finally understand what was wrong and could now concentrate on how to make it better. I was referred to the NHS Guided Self Help Service and with the support of my wife, family and friends, I was encouraged to hand in my resignation and take the first step towards starting a freelance career. This was something I’d wanted to do for a number of years but had never felt ready or good enough to start.

Looking back over the last twelve months I have no regrets. While freelancing is extremely tough it is also very rewarding with my business growing slowly but surely. The course of Guided Self Help enabled me to understand and react to my symptoms and I feel a lot better for it. While the thinking that brought on my illness is not something that will go away entirely, it is something I can learn to live with. I have developed various coping mechanisms to deal with stress and negative thoughts, the most important of which is being open and honest about how I am feeling. Whereas before I bottled things up, now I can talk about them. On Saturday, The Scotsman website published an article by Billy Watson, the chief executive of the Scottish Association for Mental Health. Mr Watson wrote that ‘Talking is the only option when it comes to mental health. It’s time for Scotland to open up.’ I couldn’t agree more.

Further information and assistance can be found at Breathing Space Scotland, Samaritans, Scottish Association for Mental Health, See Me Scotland and Penumbra.