Festival diary: Fishing for a mention - and he's got one

Arthur Smith will only give out review tickets to critics who appear on stage with him. In fact, says the troublesome comic: "I am happy to offer £100 to any reviewer who is game to juggle three kippers (or, indeed, any large fish) at once on stage."

This an insult to both critics and kippers - and those who relish them for breakfast. And exactly how much is he offering - in fish - to get his show, A Cobbled Up Chambels, mentioned in a diary column?

Dad's the word

NINA Conti's brilliant Scottish granny sketch was a hit at the Pleasance venue launch, and the comic's show, Talk to the Hand, has brought talk of a return of ventriloquism on the Fringe.

On Sunday, there's an added attraction when the guests quizzed by her and her puppets include her father, Tom Conti. Although they have appeared in a play together, this will be the first time they have appeared on stage as themselves. To be precise, he is Paisley-born Thomas Conti, graduate of the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama, Tony award-winner and Oscar nominee for Reuben, Reuben. No word on which puppet's going to grill him.

Prepare for a scare

Stephen King called Wait Until Dark, starring Audrey Hepburn as a recently blinded girl who solves a murder, as the scariest film of all time.

Blindspot Productions is trying to recreate it on the Fringe stage, with the help of a lot of visual tricks and with Charlie Mulliner in Hepburn's Oscar-nominated role.

Agnes Meath Baker, currently reading German and philosophy at Wadham, is playing a 12-year-child.

The writer is Frederick Knott, of Dial M for Murder fame. His estate has been grumbling at the licensing rights company for permitting the production, apparently, as the play is currently under a major West End option.

Tilting at Windmill

AS Nicholas Parsons interviewed Miles Jupp on the Happy Hour this week, the chat moved bizarrely from cricket to Parsons recalling sliding up and down a greasy pole as the comic at the Windmill club.

The revue bar was run by the celebrated Mrs Henderson, and the girls posed in nude tableaux - if they moved, it was considered pornography. Judi Dench later starred in the film.

But did we really need to know?