The strangest questions ever asked about Scotland on Yahoo! Answers

A woman, pondering a question on Yahoo! Answers, perhaps. Picture: Ian Rutherford

The community Q&A site launched in 2005 and has, on occasion, attracted ridicule as a repository of ludicrous questions – and equally ludicrous answers.

A scholarly resource, Yahoo! Answers is not – but its thousands of answers are pretty entertaining. We’ve cleaved a sample of some of the most bizzare.

Q: What is Scotland like?

A: “Living here is brilliant but cold, really really cold.”

A: “Lots of hills, where the haggis often run wild.”

A: “Scotland is the land far in the mythic north of the British Isles. There is a settlement of barbaric natives who live amongst the misty Highland hills and only come down to hunt and ravage English citizens. This is done jubilantly to the sound of ‘och aye’ and blaring bagpipe music. The English are minced into haggis and washed down with a dram of whisky.”

Q: Why are there so many single guys in Scotland?

A: “It seems in general that there are more single men (defined as never having been married... not divorced or widowed) early in life, but after people reach their 60s, there are more single women. I take it that there are a lot of older guys marrying younger girls.”

A: “Well where are they all? If there are any out there feel free to email me! (Scottish accents are sooo hot!)”

Q: Why did Hitler not invade Scotland?

A: “Have you ever seen the coast of Scotland? Geez, if you think the Allies had a hard time at Normandy... Not to mention the weather and sea conditions of the North Sea.”

A: “Obviously, you have never been to Scotland. Apart from its land mass, it has many islands all up and down the west coast. Besides, Scots would given the Germans a run for their money!”

Q: What and where is a place called Scotland?

A: “It’s a place in Europe, capital of England possibly or obviously situated in North Europa. The inhabitants mostly speak a form of pidgin French - Ecosse.”

Q: What is the New York City of Scotland?

A: “The big city is Glasgow - the urban area is three to four times bigger than Edinburgh’s. Edinburgh is prettier, but there is just so much more to do in Glasgow.”

A: “Compared to New York, [Scotland’s cities] could probably best be described as more like lesser known US locations such as Stamford, Connecticut, White Plains, New York, or Peoria, Illinois - only with narrower streets and more socialism.”

Q: Do unicorns exist in Scotland?

A: “Yes of course. I’ve seen them, along with wild haggis. They’re elusive little blighters.”

A: “I rode one to work everyday - or I did until I got laid off...”

A: “Unfortunately, the Vikings hunted them to extinction.”