Louisa Pearson: ‘I’ve had alcoholic neighbours who shouted all night instead of sleeping’

When the sheep in the field next to where I live baa, it’s exactly the same note as my mobile phone’s ringtone. As you can imagine, this leads to some confusion

“Can you hear a phone ringing?” I ask. “No,” says Mr Green, shaking his head and working on his best “how did I end up living with a madwoman?” expression. “It must be the sheep,” I mutter, checking my phone for missed calls. Animal sounds are the closest thing to noise pollution round these parts. The rooks are raucous, the cattle sometimes sound like they’re being given an intimate exploration by James Heriot and the blackbirds trill for attention, but it doesn’t really compare with the dark years spent living in a thin-walled city flat.

So does being green mean being quiet? Does unwanted noise count as environmental pollution? The people behind Noise Action Week (www.noiseactionweek.org.uk) think so. But what sort of noise? Noise from neighbours, licensed premises, schools, transport and a multitude of other sources. I’ve lived next to a busy A-road, had alcoholic neighbours who shouted all night instead of sleeping and lived upstairs from an aspiring DJ whose daily ten-hour bass-throbbing sets were the final straw that sent me fleeing the city in search of a cottage with thick stone walls. Don’t talk to me about noise; whisper.

The Department for Environment, Food and Rural Affairs has the best definition of noise I could find: “Noise is subjective and defined as ‘unwanted sound’. As such, one person’s noise is another person’s sound.” This was illustrated recently in a Somerset village where a church clock was silenced by a nuisance order, following complaints from new residents. Long-term residents were less than impressed.

For organisations such as Friends of the Earth and Greenpeace, the main concerns are airport expansions or oceans. Recent studies have found that ocean noise pollution is getting worse – not just because of shipping but because of carbon emissions, which cause acidification, allowing underwater noise to travel further. This has been linked to deafness in dolphins and loss of habitat as marine mammals look for peace and quiet.

Back on dry land, neighbour mediation services in Scotland report that around 50 per cent of cases are about noise. TVs, stereos, barking dogs and car alarms sare just a few sounds that can prevent you from loving thy neighbour.

While unwanted noise is invading our personal space, spare a moment to ponder the effect of man-made noise on the natural soundscape. This can be entertaining when you see a lyre bird on a David Attenborough documentary imitating a chainsaw, but a US study found that man-made noise can interfere with animals’ ability to communicate, mate and feed. Some birds, such as the great tit, have been able to adapt and call at higher frequencies; others, such as the robin, have taken to singing at night in urban areas because it’s quieter.

While I’m not convinced being quiet is a prerequisite to being green, it’s certainly to be encouraged. So well done to the Noise Abatement Society, which has launched Quiet Mark (www.quietmark.com), a scheme that endorses the quietest hedge trimmers, hairdryers and other products. If they can be both quiet and energy-efficient, we’re in business.