The Covid lockdown weight gain is just getting worse - Gaby Soutar

The return to restaurants has scuppered my diet.

Most of my life, I’ve been slim-ish.

In fact, the second most common question I’ve always been asked as a restaurant reviewer is “where do you put all that food?”

I think it’s rhetorical of course, but I always say I’m wearing elaborate corsets and Spanx.

I don’t think I’d be asked that quite so regularly now.

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Apparently, during lockdown, most of us put on about 10 pounds.

It’s true that pretty much every friend and family member I’ve seen, after a long hiatus, has had a softer jawline and slightly cuddlier texture.

In my case, and probably theirs too, that’s in part down to the lack of active commuting, and a general sense of low-energy ennui. Team that with the sudden normalisation of Biscoff doughnuts as an afternoon snack.

Pic Lisa Ferguson 25/08/2015

New Magazine byline pics - Gaby SoutarPic Lisa Ferguson 25/08/2015

New Magazine byline pics - Gaby Soutar
Pic Lisa Ferguson 25/08/2015 New Magazine byline pics - Gaby Soutar

Currently, doing up my jeans is like tying a string round the middle of a balloon – a perfect illustration of the Soutars’ propensity to apple-shaped-ness.

We should change our surname to Braeburn. When I walk, I feel a gentle ripple, like I’m a blancmange on top of a speaker.

The problem is that it’s getting worse. I thought I’d spring back after lockdown, like celebrities are supposed to two minutes after giving birth. However, I’ve been hamstrung by the excitement of returning to restaurants.

I have bon vivant-ed my way round them with great gusto. I check my willpower at the door, before scanning the QR code.

In my last The Scotsman Magazine restaurant review, I ordered a pizza that was topped with sausage, bacon and Buckfast. In tomorrow’s magazine, you can read about me troughing pig’s head terrine and chocolate mousse.

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Now it’s autumn, when the temperature drops and my hunger takes the form of a bear.

However, since it’s Friday – one of my official treat days, which also includes Monday, Wednesday and the weekend – and I’ve already purchased my regular caramel brownie, I’m going to port these worries for the weekend.

Also, in case you’re wondering what the number one most common question I get asked as a restaurant reviewer is, it’s “do they know that you’re coming?”.

The answer is no, but I’m definitely much harder to miss these days.

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