How to get a Hollywood body

And, more importantly, where can we sign up to follow in their footsteps?

POWER-PLATE

Who does it? Sadie Frost, Claudia Schiffer, Gaby Logan, right, and Jonathan Ross

Where can you do it? Home models cost 2,599, private and class sessions are available at Fitness First in Edinburgh and Glasgow. For a full list of UK stockists and participating gyms call Power-plate, 0207-586 7200. Prices vary.

What's it like? I was wholly unprepared for what the juddering vibrations of this machine (designed to intensify the effect of exercises performed on it), right, did to my vision and my head. As I held one of the poses it seemed as if the whole room wobbled, and my head felt like a moneybox someone was shaking.

Apparently this is good for skin tone because Power-plate training pumps blood into the tiniest blood vessel 50 times per second - goodbye cellulite, hello taut skin, broken-down fat-cells and hyper-efficient circulation that improves and builds muscle tissues, strengthens the heart and improves flexibility.

After a vibrational blitz I am able to stretch an extra two or three inches beyond my toes. A work-out is 25 minutes and during that time I'm directed to stand, sit, squat, balance and rest on the vibrating platform. Judder aside, I'm sorely tempted to sign up for a few more sessions.

FIRST PLATOON BOOT CAMP CLASSES

Who does it? Julia Roberts, left, Drew Barrymore, Sharon Stone

Where can you do it? Fitness First gyms run boot camp classes until September. www.fitnessfirst.co.uk, 0870-898 8080. (Free for Fitness First members; free one-day trial.)

What's it like? Trainers wear Army shorts and polo-shirts with SAS - Strength And Stamina - emblazoned on the chest. Ours acts the sergeant major, barking commands. When I fluff an arm-swing I am not thrilled to have my poor co-ordination highlighted for all of the local residents to hear. But he mellows and I am shocked to discover I am semi-enjoying myself.

Exercising under the sun beats the gym and though I can't manage all the lunges and squats, I do go the right way around the obstacle course. One routine involves lying down while each member of the team runs, at the double, over all our bodies. There are press-ups and tiring star-jumps, and the hour ends with two five-minute runs; I pause too long behind the ice cream van and come last both times.

My inner thighs still ache the next day and I'm sure I have burned hundreds of calories - but if this were my sole fitness regime I would worry about the lack of exercises that target arms and abs.

VACUNAUT

Who does it? Robbie Williams, Anna Friel, Kerry McFadden

Where can you do it? Ersatz in Cumbernauld (01236-795 643); Fresh Start Fitness, Glasgow (0141-332 6022) . For a list of gyms with Vacunauts call 08007-311 323 or visit www.vacunaut.co.uk (12 sessions cost from 45).

What's it like? I am zipped into a three-quarter-length wetsuit attached to three small hoses and a machine which sucks out the air between the body and the suit.

This creates a vacuum around the stomach where 122 pressure points provide a fluctuation between low and high pressure as I stride away on the treadmill for an intensive 40 minute stretch.

I'm told all the heat I generate combined with pressure from the vacuum draws blood to muscles around the midriff to burn fat. Afterwards the bodysuit is soaked in sweat and I find I have lost a fantastic 2cm from my waist.

Apparently, in 12 sessions I could lose two dress sizes; I'm prepared to look unsexy if the end result is sexy - so I'm booking in.

BOWFLEX TREADCLIMBER

Who does it? Kiefer Sutherland

Where can you do it? Bowflex Treadclimbers will be introduced into gyms around the UK from September, in the meantime you can buy one to use at home. They cost 1,399 from www.tread climber.co.uk, or call 01908-267 345 to find your nearest stockist.

What's it like? It's a three-in-one machine - treadmill, stairclimber and elliptical trainer. The aim is to help burn calories and work different muscle groups.

By walking on it you'll burn twice the calories you would on a treadmill.

Two separate treadmills act like a stairclimber but they have moving belts so you walk forward and step at the same time.

This is a very manageable exercise and I am neither puce nor sweating when I finish.

THE ELIZABETH REYES EMERGENCY FITNESS SCHEME

Who does it? Sophie Anderton, right, Princess Tamara Czartoryski

Where can you do it? Only in London at present, with Elizabeth Reyes herself, at Fitness First gyms: call 07900-565 692 or email [email protected].

What's it like? Each of her exercises combines two or more workouts in one. The exercises are gruelling but original because she incorporates everyday items.With two carrier bags filled with bags of sugar and flour, I bring my hands towards my shoulders as I do a squat - it takes concentration but I'm happy to be toning arms, thighs and tummy.

She has me skipping for 30 seconds which gets my heart racing.

The "turbo tummy flattener" involves lying on my back then raising myself on to my elbows and lifting my bottom five inches off the ground (I'm then told to lift one leg a few inches and hold for a count of six). I repeat this 10 times. She then has me skipping and doing squats. I quickly get tired but this 15-minute "mini body-sculpting workout" produces rapid results if done daily.

RUSSIAN KETTLEBELLS

Who does it? Kim Cattrall, Penlope Cruz, J-Lo, Matthew McConaughey, left

Where can you do it? Svetlana Writtle currently operates in London, but check out the kettlebell exercises and buy your own set. They cost from 80 from www.kettlebells.co.uk, 01159-202 810.

What's it like? You swing, squat, lift and stretch, holding what looks like a bowling ball with a handle. It delivers cardio, strength training and toning. No wonder the Russians kept it secret so long; it seems the perfect answer for those who are time-poor.

Svetlana Writtle, athlete turned kettlebell trainer, should be cloned so more people can benefit from this workout. It takes just three sessions to perfect a series of double movements which I can really feel working my stomach, waist, buttocks and arms. Svetlana checks my posture while I grasp an 8kg kettlebell.The momentum is satisfying and my hip-thrusting would make Elvis proud. "Conventional weights only target one or two muscles, they hardly raise your heart rate, and they produce bulk instead of the dense lean muscles you get from kettlebells," says Svetlana. I have bags of energy that evening and don't ache the next day.

ACROBATICS

Who does it? Gisele Bundchen, Sarah Jessica Parker

Where can you do it? Find a local acrobatic gymnastics instructor: try the Falkirk-based Scottish Gymnastics Association (01324 886505; www.scottishgymnastics.com) or see www.sportscotland.org.uk.

What's it like? According to former gymnast Aileen Kilshaw, within weeks of taking up proper training, anyone is capable of doing the splits, walking on their hands and flipping their legs over their head from a bridge position. Surely such skills would make excellent party tricks, and dazzle any male with a penchant for supple, bendy females.

Aileen's exercises are designed to build up strength and flexibility. She focuses on exercises that work on everything from wrist and shoulder strength - needed for handstands and flips - to hamstring flexibility for walking handstands. I go as low as I can (not very) into a splits position and hold for 30 seconds. We do balancing exercises and jump up and down off foam bricks to perfect landing positions. I do the first headstand I've done since I was 13. I'm tired out after the session, but Aileen's positive attitude is infectious.

So, how did I do?

• I'VE lifted, stretched, puffed and panted; I've been juddered, sucked and manhandled into trying to achieve a Hollywood body.

Unfortunately, over the same period I've developed a fattening fetish for taramasalata and Doritos so I've only lost two per cent of my excess body fat.

I'd need to give up my job if I were to undertake all these practices regularly, but I've surprised myself - Kettlebells are fun and I'm sticking with them, I'd like to practise acrobatics and there's a host of new generation gym machines that I'll buy the minute I win the Lottery.

I have more energy than ever, my arms have lost all their flab and I have developed small muscles which I keep flexing and showing off.

Last week in a rare visit to the dance floor I discovered my thighs are now so strong that I could crouch down low and groove with dancers far fitter than me.