Oscar outfit: Charlize Theron

Even without the pink satin bullseyes on her breasts, this Oscar de la Renta dress is vile.

It's the kind of dress that every bridesmaid dreads being shoehorned into; bad fit, boring colour, frumpy fishtail. But those bullseyes look like she borrowed Madonna's conical bra then fell over and flattened it. Or like sinister cartoon eyes; one's tempted to draw a smiley mouth on her crotch to complete the look. Either way, this one will be topping everyone's worst-dressed list.

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