Lifelines: Sally Norton on living with under-fives

IN THE early days, as you stare adoringly at your newborn baby while it lies there blowing milky bubbles and smiling its gorgeous gummy smile, it's hard to believe this very same child could ever cause you any problems – never mind grow up into a highly evolved human being who can win an argument simply by using three words – "no", "no" and "no".

But that's the thing about children – one minute they're a tiny newborn unable to either support the weight of their own head or to tell the difference between daddy and a hat stand, the next they're an emotional toddler who's terrified of being washed down the plughole along with the dirty bath water. The good news is that there are simple ways to address some of the most common issues experienced by the under-fives.

POTTY MOUTH

How do I stop my eight-month-old son putting everything in his mouth? Yesterday I found him sucking a stone in the garden. I'm terrified he'll pick up some deadly germ and get really ill.

A mum I know came into the bathroom to find her youngest son sucking the bristles of the loo brush. But he survived. It goes without saying that you shouldn't let your toddler put anything obviously dirty or small enough to cause choking into their mouth. But all the baby books I've read seem to agree that under-ones – and even older children – use their mouths to help them discover the world around them. Rather than forcing them to stop, it might be more sensible to let them grow out of this habit.

SLEEP ON IT

Ever since my two-year-old daughter moved from her cot into her big girl's bed, she's got into the habit of sleeping with us every night. When I try putting her back into her own bed, she throws an almighty tantrum. How can I stop her?

Ask any two-year-old the best thing about moving from cot to bed and they're bound to say it's the fact they are now free to spend every night with their parents.

It all comes down to habit. If you don't want your child to share your bed every night, you shouldn't allow them to ever sleep there – even if you occasionally think it would be nice. It isn't easy. A soft night-light in your child's bedroom and one of your T-shirts to cuddle might help. I found that taking my daughter straight back to her own bed and giving her a cuddle for a minute did the trick – well, sometimes.

FOOD FIGHT

My three-year-old daughter, has become a really fussy eater, particularly when it comes to vegetables. I feel I'm fighting a constant "battle of the broccoli". My GP has checked her over and says she's completely healthy but that doesn't help. Any suggestions?

I know a child who refused to eat any food group that was touching another food group. And another who limited herself to just pitta bread and carrots. The truth is that lots of children are fussy eaters at this stage but most grow out of it.

However frustrating it may be, the experts all agree you should never force a child to eat, but continue to offer them healthy alternatives. Make meal times sociable and make sure you eat with them, too. A child may need to taste a new food ten times or more before they decide they like it, so persevere.

101 Things to do Before You're Five, by Sally Norton, is available at Waterstones (www.waterstones.com) and Amazon (www.amazon.co.uk)

•This article was first published in Scotland on Sunday on 16 May 2010