Lifelines: Dr Alex Yellowlees on alcohol

UPTO a third of us are believed to suffer from an addiction. At its worst this breaks up families, damages communities and destroys lives. In one way or another it affects most of our lives.

Despite this, there is a great deal of misunderstanding about addiction – what it is, who it affects and how to get help and support.

Alcohol abuse is a very serious problem in a family and is a major factor in family violence and divorce. The official symptoms are craving alcohol, being unable to stop once one starts drinking, physical withdrawal symptoms if one stops and the need for increasing amounts in order to get drunk.

Drinking is a normal part of many people's social or working environments so it can be easy to lose track of a dependency problem developing.

FAMILY CONNECTION

My family are telling me I drink too much, although I believe I am in control. However, my father was an alcoholic. Does this make me more likely to become one and how can I know if this is happening?

Many people who have an alcohol problem mistakenly believe they can "control" their drinking. They kid themselves that all is well and ignore those who are trying to tell them it is not. People who have family members with an alcohol problem are more likely to develop one themselves. Examine your drinking pattern. How often do you drink – every day? Several times a day? How much do you drink? Has it slowly increased over time? Has your drinking caused you any kind of harm, illness, time off work, relationship difficulties, trouble with the authorities? If family members are concerned they are likely to be correct.

IN DENIAL

My partner is drinking heavily and this is affecting me and the children. So far he has managed to keep his job but I know people are talking about him and it's only a matter of time before he is found out. How can I help him?

Living with an alcoholic is probably one of the most frightening and isolating problems families ever have to cope with.

Part of having an alcohol problem is that the individual cannot see, or chooses not to see, what their behaviour is doing. More often than not, they are unaware of the consequences their drug and or alcohol use is having on themselves and others.

You need to stop covering for your partner and help him face up to his problems. Tell him about the negative impact that his drinking is having on you and your children.

Get information about alcohol support groups and try to persuade him to visit his doctor, who will be able to refer him for expert help.

TEEN WORRIES

My 19-year-old daughter goes out every weekend with her friends and they get extremely drunk. Am I right to be worried or is this normal teenage behaviour?

What your daughter is doing is binge-drinking. She has probably convinced herself she hasn't got a problem because she regularly has days when she doesn't drink at all.

Try to explain the danger she is putting herself in. Statistically speaking, if you're drunk you're more likely to harm yourself by accident. Binge drinking can bring you into contact with crime in several ways, as a victim or villain. It can also cause heart or liver problems later in life.

Binge drinking can shape your future drinking habits, often leading to a harmful dependence on alcohol.

Dr Alex Yellowlees is a consultant psychiatrist and medical director of the Priory Hospital Glasgow (www.priorygroup.com)

• This article was first published in Scotland on Sunday July 4, 2010