Health: couple who worked hard to lay foundations of family fell foul of 'parent trap'

"I'm 33 weeks pregnant now," she says. "I'm looking forward to the school breaking up for summer and just having some quiet time before it all starts."

Her baby is due to arrive in early August, a first child that Diane and partner David Turnbull had often wondered they'd have.

At 37 years old and having tried for three years to become pregnant, Diane found herself branded "too old" to have a baby.

"I couldn't believe it," she says. "I'm fit and healthy. The only problem was that we were trying for a baby and it wasn't happening. But to be told at that age that you're too old . . ."

Diane's road to motherhood is a cautionary tale for young women confronted with the dilemma of choosing career or children.

Like many of her generation, Diane poured her energy into putting her university education to use - in an ironic twist, she works as a health and welfare teacher at a secondary school - then setting up her home and spending time with her partner.

However, as her attention shifted to having a family, precious time was running out.

Just as her body clock began to tick at its loudest, she found herself falling into the same "parent trap" that many smart, educated women like her are discovering to their cost.

When, after months of trying and failing to conceive, Diane and David sought help from their local NHS hospital, they found long waiting lists for treatment that meant by the time they reached the top, Diane would be over the age limit to have that treatment.

"I underwent tests that showed there was no obvious reason why we couldn't conceive," Diane explains. "So we couldn't believe when they said 'sorry, you're going to be too old'. It was shocking."

According to Gwenda Burns of Infertility Network UK, Diane's story isn't particularly unusual.

Indeed, it's an increasingly common complaint among couples in their mid-30s who, as their desperation to start a family reaches a peak, contact the organisation for support."There is a problem at the moment in Scotland because the waiting lists are growing all the time," Gwenda says.

"In some respects, Scotland is better than England because of the types of treatment available, but the waiting lists are causing huge problems.

"If you are 35 or 36 years old and you go on a waiting list that can stretch to three-and-a-half years, you might manage to get one cycle of treatment before hitting the cut-off age.

"But will one cycle be enough to get you a baby?"

With no NHS options, the pair realised their only hope for a family would be to raid their savings and go private.

They approached IVF Scotland, Edinburgh's only private in vitro fertilisation facility, where, after just one cycle of treatment, Diane's pregnancy was confirmed.

However, it's a journey towards parenthood that has cost them almost 5000 and has tested their relationship.

"I know that Diane feels quite strongly that having worked all her life, paid taxes and having gone on to build a career as principal teacher of health and wellbeing in the school that she teaches, that it's unfair to be penalised by not being allowed to try IVF on the NHS," says David, 32, a business development executive at Walker Street market research firm, Lynn Jones Research.

"Diane's not that old. Essentially, you are being penalised for making sure you have the means to provide a good life for yourself and your family.

"With more women establishing a career first these days, this means more women are being cut off from the chance of having free IVF treatment," he adds.

"I suppose the counter argument would be, therefore, that you can afford private IVF but that's not really the point."

Their experience shows how easily couples can slide into a fertility nightmare.

Like many of her generation, former Firrhill High School pupil Diane had been determined to forge a career.

She studied at Queen Margaret University, completed her teaching degree at Moray House, then in her mid-20s sought a teaching job. She met David, a George Watson's College former pupil who studied at both Heriot-Watt and Napier universities, and decided to set up home in Dunfermline.

"We had some time together as couple and then started thinking about a family," says Diane. "But it was a year before alarm bells really started to ring."

The route to getting help, however, turned out to be painfully slow.

"I went to my GP and he said to come back after six months if nothing had happened and that I should try to relax. By the time I was referred to our local NHS Fife IVF hospital and tests started, it was two years down the line.

"I was 37 years old by then.There were no real factors to prevent me falling pregnant - ours was 'unexplained' infertility.

"Then I was told the waiting time was so long that I wouldn't get to the top of the list in time. It was devastating."

When Spire Healthcare opened its 25 million fertility unit, Shawfair Park Hospital, near Danderhall, in April last year, it confirmed it would not bar any patients because of age. Diane and David were among its first patients.

Figures for its first year show it is achieving above national average successes, with pregnancy rates for patients under 35 running at 48 per cent compared with 33 per cent.

Lead consultant at the clinic, Dr Joo Thong, says the figures give hope to patients who find themselves having to consider private treatment: "The figures are incredibly promising. IVF treatment isn't cheap, so it's important that every single patient has the best chances possible to become pregnant."

TICKING CLOCK

WHILE government in vitro fertilisation guidelines call for hospitals to treat women up to the age of 40, NHS Fife's criteria for assisted conception states that women should be under 38.

Gwenda Burns of Infertility Network UK says the waiting list for treatment in the area is three-and-a-half years.

"As far as Fife goes, you have to be fairly young to get the maximum treatment of three cycles - particularly as you have to drop to the end of the list should treatment fail."

It means that three failed attempts at IVF could take as long as ten years.

NHS Lothian, meanwhile, offers IVF treatment to women up to the age of 40. The waiting time is two years.

Private IVF treatment typically costs around 5000 per cycle. Spire Healthcare treats approximately 40 patients every month.