FILM

FILM

Hats off to Kirkcaldy, which seems to have beaten every other Scottish town in the race to get Christmas under way as soon as is humanly possible

photograph: Getty

jonathan trew

It turns out that Andy Warhol was wrong. Strangely, his theory that we will all be famous for 15 minutes has been disproved by Jedward, the former X Factor contestants. Long after Jedward's 15 minutes should have been up, they seem to be showing no sign of disappearing back into obscurity. Instead, the popularity of the curiously quiffed twins seems to be growing and, as well as their gig at the Queen's Hall tomorrow night, further gigs in Glasgow, Aberdeen and Dundee have been added to their Planet Jedward tour schedule.

In some quarters, it has been suggested that X Factor wannabes Diva Fever are the new Jedward; a submission which seems a trifle harsh on both parties. Still, there's nothing like manufacturing a little rivalry to spice up a talent show.

Considerably less garish is a new exhibition which is going up in Glasgow's Mono cafe bar from tomorrow. Called Jesus Has Left the Building, it is a mix of prose, sound and photographs of deconsecrated churches. They were shot in Glasgow and Edinburgh by Iain Shaw. There is a trailer for the exhibition on YouTube and it's rather haunting.

What is striking about the exhibition is how many of the former churches have been converted to bars. I'm much more partial to spending an evening in a bar than my Sunday mornings in a church but there is still something sad and forlorn about the pictures of churches being put to uses that their builders would never have imagined.

On a more jolly note, hats off to Kirkcaldy, which seems to have beaten every other Scottish town in the race to get Christmas underway as soon as is humanly possible. Their reindeer parade makes its way through the town centre at around noon today and Santa should be arriving on his sleigh at the Mercat Centre at around 12:45pm. Fingers crossed that the currently choppy financial climate doesn't worsen or the nation's retailers will try to bring the festive season forward to Halloween.

Meanwhile, over at Glasgow Harbour, the Visible Fictions theatre company has had the cracking idea of staging a play inspired by Bram Stoker's Dracula in the Tall Ship. In Stoker's novel, the bloodthirsty count arrives in Britain on board The Demeter. Apart from the dead captain, who is lashed to the wheel, there are no signs of the ship's crew.

Called The Curse of the Demeter, Visible Fictions' play ponders the on-board events which led up to the ship running aground in Whitby. With space for an audience of just 20, it should be a very intimate and perhaps even claustrophobic performance. One imagines that the audience will be jumping every time the wind whistles in the rigging.

For more information, visit: www.planetjedward.net; www.monocafebar.com; www.fifedirect.org.uk; www.visiblefictions.co.uk

We know this is exposing our geekiness, but we couldn't help but be attracted to these cute Etre Touchy lambswool gloves. They're a hybrid of regular gloves and Albert Steptoe-esque fingerless versions, as they only leave four digits exposed. Why, you may ask? So you can play with your phone, iPod, iPad or other gadgetry. Genius.

Gloves, 19.99, Etre Touchy (www.etretouchy.com)

Goo Goo Dolls

Academy, Glasgow, tomorrow, 27

Formed in 1986 in Buffalo, New York, the Goo Goo Dolls have spent most of the last two and a half decades at the decidedly un-hip end of the musical spectrum. But as their clutch of chart-bothering singles attest, fans of the band are out there in their thousands. The Goo Goos are a powerful live act, too. Their 1998 hit Iris, which featured on the soundtrack to the Meg Ryan and Nicolas Cage weepie City of Angels, is a bellow-along power ballad of considerable wattage.

Tel: [phone]

As part of a plan to reinvigorate Glasgow's Barras market, the Made in the Shade team have launched a new Supermercado event. From today between 10am and 4:30pm, 20 independent businesses, including specialist bakers, artisan coffee roasters, vintage clothing sellers, designers and florists will showcase their wares. You can also expect live music, and there will be free Tunnock's teacakes from The Barras Buffet, while stocks last.

The Made in the Shade Supermercado, The Barras Centre, 54 Calton Entry, Glasgow (www.wearemadeintheshade.com)

If your tastebuds require stimulation, spice up your grub with something from the new Heston from Waitrose range. It includes Vanilla Salt (4.99, 50g), which can be used in apple pies, cakes or on fish, green vegetables or potatoes. Alternatively, try Vanilla Mayonnaise (3, 210g) on smoked fish, or sprinkle Coriander & Rose Salt (4.99, 50g) over your chips. If you're after a dish to warm the cockles, then the Beef, Ale & Kombu (a Japanese seaweed) Pie (2.61, 270g) sounds particularly yummy.

Waitrose nationwide (www.waitrose.com)

Strathaven Striders Run with the Wind 10K

Starts at Whitelee Wind Farm, near Strathaven, tomorrow, 15 (13 conc)

Sick of taking part in gruelling uphill races? Then this 10K run, organised by South Lanarkshire running club, the Strathaven Striders, could be for you. The mostly downhill course starts at the Ardochrig entrance to Whitelee Wind Farm and finishes in Kirkland Park, Strathaven. It's an undulating route, so you will have to climb 60m, but you'll get to descend more than three times that. All 350 places have now been taken, but anyone looking to make a last-minute entry should join the waiting list at www.entrycentral.com

For full details, see www.strathavenstriders.co.uk

If cold sarnies aren't hitting the spot at lunchtime any more, then pick up one of these cute little bento boxes from Howards Storage World. These leak-proof containers, which come in a range of colours, can keep food warm for up to five hours, so you can eat your piping-hot stew, last night's leftovers or stir-fry al-desko.

Aladdin bento lunch box, 10.95, Howards Storage World (www.howardsstorageworld.co.uk)

Jackass 3D (15)

Johnny Knoxville and the gang are back with more hilarious/immature stunts (delete according to taste), and this time their pratfalls have all been shot in glorious 3D. Some unexpected things do leap from the screen - swarming bees, a party blower extending from someone's rear end - but the film mostly sticks to the tried-and-tested Jackass formula: genital injury, close encounters with dangerous animals, fun with body hair and adhesives. Also look out for a skit entitled The High Five, in which unsuspecting dopes are knocked over by a giant swinging hand.

Cinemas nationwide

Hebrides Ensemble: Vesalii Icones, 10 (8 conc)

Woodend Barn, Banchory, today; then on tour to Inverness and Edinburgh

As part of the Sound festival, the Hebrides Ensemble have teamed team up with choreographer Michael Popper and percussionist Colin Currie to perform a mixture of chamber music, ballet and performance art. The programme consists of music with a Renaissance theme by contemporary composers: Maxwell Davies' Vesalii Icones and Renaissance Dances, Ades' Court Studies from The Tempest and Birtwistle's The Axe Manual.

Tel: [phone], visit www.sound-scotland.co.uk

• This article was first published in The Scotsman on November 6, 2010