Theatre review: Svetlana, Assembly George Square Studios, Edinburgh

"Never fuck wi’ a burd fae Moscow when they're absorbin' high opera."
Svetlana, Assembly George Square Studios (Venue 17)Svetlana, Assembly George Square Studios (Venue 17)
Svetlana, Assembly George Square Studios (Venue 17)

Svetlana, Assembly George Square Studios, Edinburgh * * *

It’s a lesson to live by if you want to survive a meeting with Svetlana - Russia's deadliest female spy, who just happens to speak as if she had been raised in Pollok. There's no explanation as to why exactly Svetlana bears the least Russian accent ever, but if anything, her broad Glaswegian only makes her appear even more dangerous as she thunders around the world battling Chechen warlords and “Kim Jong-what’s-his-pus", ever ready to deploy her weapon of choice; a boot in the “haw-maws”.

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To audiences not well-versed in the detail of Scottish - and particularly Glaswegian - dialect, the finer points of Paul F. Matthews’ play might seem a bit confusing, perhaps even impenetrable. Yet Nicola Jo Cully is a fine actor, directed with brisk energy by Laila Noble, and she gives Svetlana just the right blend of being indefatigably radge and also keen to live up to her superstar spy billing; meanwhile, it's always nice to see a Bond spoof which tears the cocky blokiness of the original down a peg or two. Anyone with a taste for raw, gallus late-night humour will find an hour in Svetlana’s company well-spent.

Until 25 August (not 20)

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