Can improv skills improve your sex life? Yes yes yes, says Edinburgh Fringe performer Lizzy Skrzypiec

Murder, She Didn’t Write | Lee Pullen

It’s an odd question I’ll admit, but when considering either a potential shag at the Fringe or looking for some top tips in the bedroom then look no further than improv. It might be hard to imagine the cast of ‘Whose Line Is It Anyway’ getting anyone hot under the collar but, trust me, the rules that make great improv extend to making some sensational moves in the bedroom. discard that mental image of the awkward overconfident voice-breaking student improviser and replace it with a partner with whom you can enjoy an earth-shattering connection between the sheets. Who knew the rules of YES AND were so close to YES OH YES?!

It's incredible how little listening goes on when it comes to getting down and dirty. And I don’t just mean in a verbal sense. Number one on the list of improv skills is listening – really listening to your partner. Ever watched a stand-up comedian join an improv troupe on stage and just start doing their ‘bit’ out to the audience, completely missing the signals and offers from their fellow stage partners? Nobody wants foreplay with a bulldozer.

Listening can add heaps of connection to the most passionate moments. The sounds your partner makes. The way they lean into or away from certain movements. Listening is paying attention to your partner and how they react. Do they go quiet? Does their body tense up? Do they grab the sheets with their fists? Listening isn’t something we do with our eyes closed. It requires attention. And improv teaches us just that. During ‘Murder, She Didn’t Write’ improvisers make eye contact with each other and watch their partners’ physicality on stage. They’ll look for signs of ‘having an idea’ or ‘needing help’ which is all communicated non-verbally. Then they’ll build on that, or ‘yes and’, with their own offers and moves.

Improv is by no means a one-way street – it’s a dialogue, not a monologue, and skilled improv requires both parties communicating with each other efficiently and effortlessly. The more you communicate with each other the less chance there is of someone missing the mark or someone misunderstanding where you want them to go. On stage it’s important to give clear offers. And the clearer the offer, the less chance of confusing your scene partner. During ‘Murder…’ when we are dealing with complex motives and evidence, if someone joins me on stage and says “Where have you been?” It’s hard to read if they are angry/ concerned/ suspicious/ chatty. But if they say “I’ve been looking everywhere for you Captain, I’ve been worried sick!” then I know my role in the situation and can respond with my own offer.

When it comes to connecting with our partner in intimate moments why remain in your own head and expect your partner to guess? Nobody is psychic! Let your partner know what feels good and where you are at. And once again this doesn’t have to be a verbal chat. There are a million ways to communicate how you’re feeling and what feels great. From words to grabs to changes in expressions, the more you put out there to read the more you give your partner to react to. And if this seems like a slightly forced concept then you might not be doing the following…

There is only so much in this world you can plan. And it’s very rare that a plan - when executed the same a thousand times over - comes out the same every time. Improv teaches us to be prepared to ditch the script and go with the flow. And on a deeper level, it teaches an appreciation of checking in with yourself on a moment-by-moment basis. If something is feeling good, then follow that thought. Push that button (thank you Sugababes). 

And if something stops feeling good, then alter the course and change tack. If you’re listening and connecting with each other (the other cornerstones of improv) then trying something new can be a welcome change. Being in the moment requires an awareness of self and people should not negate that when it comes to satisfying each other in the bedroom. Shake up the routine, check in with yourself, try something new.

Not everything is going to be perfect. Sometimes things are clumsy and in improv sometimes two people run on stage with conflicting ideas, and you end up with a deep-sea diver meeting the President of the United States. It feels apt to quote Robbie Burns “The best-laid schemes o’ mice and men gang aft agley”. Improv has a level of chaos about it and life is no scripted masterpiece either. When spurious mishaps occur, find the joy in it! Mistakes are all part of the shtick, and the skill of improv lies in not only dealing with the unexpected but delighting in it.

If you’re attending an improv show expecting perfection in the dialogue, then you’re missing the best layers of the performance. It’s sport! People fall over, wires get crossed, performers say something silly in the moment. It’s all part and parcel of the show. If the performers were to get terribly embarrassed or upset or angry because a scene doesn’t go exactly their way, then what does that say for when things don’t go to plan romantically? Go with the flow. Two consenting adults needn’t let an ‘oh no!’ moment end their journey to an ‘oh yes’ triumph. Laugh in those moments of chaos, together. The journey is the goal. There is excitement and connection in the unexpected.

And there you have it. The answer to the question you never thought you’d ask. Does improv make you better in bed? YES! AND perhaps next time you watch an improv show at the Fringe, you might even pick up a few tips.

Lizzy Skrzypiec appears in Murder, She Didn’t Write, Assembly George Square, 3.50pm, until 26 August.