Adidas F50 soccer shoes are outlawed. Local rules. You'll get reported. They cause irreparable damage to the hallowed, hitherto unsullied sward that is the EK square. Allegedly.
Visitors should also be wary of sudden enemy attack. As the Kelburne innings was tottering to a close, a giant tyre set in motion by neighbourhood neds came hurtling down the Calderglen Hill, crashed through a perimeter fence and rolled across the field of play. Scary stuff. Omitted, curiously, from the EKCC match report. Selective amnesia, perhaps. Or possibly just all in a day's play in the Wild West.
East Kilbride, meanwhile, came a cropper on Saturday at fiesty Freuchie.
That might refocus minds down in the bowels of the Torrance House bootroom back on to what really counts. Like an opening attack which, in three SNCL matches, has conceded 145 runs without taking a single wicket, and a disturbing penchant for mid-innings collapses - seven wickets lost for only 61 runs at Freuchie coming hard upon the six which fell for just 17 against Kelburne.