Mesut Ozil is covering Gunnersaurus' wages - but on £350,000 a week he can afford to

This crazy, mixed-up world of ours is divided in two. You either support a football team with a mascot or you follow a club who refuse to allow these idiotic, foam-faced fire hazards anywhere near the ground. I know which side I’m on, do you? And are you happy?

Tought times for Arsenal mascot Gunnersaurus.

But I was sorry to hear of Arsenal cheerleader Jerry Quy being made redundant. For 26 years he’d squeezed into a dinosaur suit to become Gunnersaurus. Obviously he has no fans to entertain right now but still: the Arse laying him off while still paying Mesut Ozil £350,000 a week not to play for them didn’t look good.

Then, a bit like a dinosaur himself, stirring from a lengthy ice age slumber, the German international announced he would cover the wages of “our green guy”. The arrangement will be for as long as Ozil remains at Arsenal, which really shouldn’t be any time at all, but we know all about the Prem’s indulgences and excesses.

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