Talk of the Town: It’s a dirty job and a digger’s gotta do it

WHILE looking after a household pet can sometimes seem a bit of a chore, spare a thought for the keepers at Edinburgh Zoo.

As well as having to deal with some very big cats they also have the unenviable task of clearing up after large animals such as rhinos, and recently gave a little insight into just what that involves.

For the gardens team, mucking out the rhinos means a lot of hard work, including a new coating of bark chips for the enclosure and bringing in an industrial digger to scoop up the rhino droppings.

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And just for good measure they added: “Next time you’re cleaning out the cat’s litter tray, just be thankful you don’t need a digger!”

Ode to Bullet puts dog’s experiences into song

MANY a topic has featured in songs at renowned city folk haunt The Royal Oak.

And now an ode to the star of the hit reality show The Scheme – Bullet the dog – has appeared on YouTube.

Sung by Bobby Nicholson, Bullet the Dug describes the pooch’s experiences with owner Marvin and girlfriend Dana – and their turbulent relationship.

“You want to hear the language and the verbal abuse, Marvin’s getting over the phone,” sings Bobby. “What with all the garbage lying round the house, I cannae even find my bone.”

Second hottest ticket

IN the battle of the ticket sales it’s hard to see anyone beating Madonna.

The Material Girl’s gig at Murrayfield is expected to sell out in minutes, with organisers even suggesting sales may have to be measured “by the second”.

But it seems she may have some competition in the form of celebrity psychological illusionist and parrot lover Derren Brown.

The enigmatic showman is set to appear at this year’s Edinburgh International Science Festival, but eager fans hoping to get briefs for the show had to be quick off the mark, with the tickets snapped up as soon as they went on sale.

Couch and potatoes

GIRLS still holding out for that dashing Mr Darcy – you might as well give up now.

Fewer than half of men in Edinburgh want a sit-down romantic meal, with 13 per cent preferring to have dinner in front of the telly.

Then again, why even bother when only a quarter of men ensure they chew quietly with their mouths closed, according to a poll by Leith-based winemakers John Crabbie & Co.