John Gibson: Old Winner more like a dog’s dinner

Some restaurants he ruthlessly rubbishes would have turned him away at the door attired like that. Striving in desperation to present a macho image.

With his younger bride on his arm, he is honeymooning in Portofino, where Italian top restaurateurs must be more accommodating than their Edinburgh counterparts. Mind you, dining out now anything goes. We hope the new Mrs Winner didn’t forget to pack his jeans.

In your wedding day garb, Michael, Porto-belo would be more your style. Just be happy. Do have an all-you-can-eat historic honeymoon.

Keep it clean

If they asked me, I could write a book about office habits that drive us crazy. A survey of 1,500 workers by Samsung UK suggests I’m on their wavelength, or the majority’s.

I ticked some of the survey’s boxes. Colleagues who shout down the phone – an emphatic yes. Colleagues whose desk surfaces resemble rubbish tips – another yes. Half-empty cans and mugs – yes again. Cups so stained my dogs wouldn’t drink out of.

God knows what their living accommodation looks like. The absolute pits, I have to suspect. Now try this . . . every Friday leave it neat and tidy. Don’t be a slob, you’re lucky to be in a job.

Afterwords . .

. . . why not Edinburgh? Bill Wyman’s Rhythm Kings will play Glasgow (October 30), Perth (October 31) and Aberdeen (November 1). Thereafter Sheffield (November 3).They’re having a night off on November 2. Don’t know why. Best ask Bill. Get him on the web. The band includes Georgie Fame, above, and Albert Lee.