John Gibson: It’s all a matter of time, Brian

We knew all the time Max Bygraves was right. You need hands. Wristwatches are on the way out and, admittedly, I’m inviting a slap on the wrist when I say so.

One in four people, it’s claimed in a study by Mintel, now rely on their mobile phones or computer clocks.

Reading the time with today’s technology prevails among the under-35s. But what do they know? Where have they been? Have they ever done a high-five with a bona fide curmudgeon?

Don’t let this news upset you. Mind your ticker! Be like Brian Laydon, beavering away there in his quaint Holyrood Road watch and clock repair shop. A man who invariably has time on his hands.

Grassic lark

We don’t need no education. Yes, we do, I’m telling Education Secretary Michael Gove. He’s saying in a national paper: “I remember from my own education we read Lewis Grassic Gibson.” That would be my great, great grandfather you’re talking about, Mr Gove?

Our education supremo studied English at Oxford University. Dare I say we got a better grasp of English at Leith Academy? Gove, Gove, Gove for it, Michael.

Rolf and folks

Hanging on to his coat-tails. Rolf Harris is to record an album of folk songs, duetting with has-beens. That must sound a bit harsh, I concede, but folk like Bonnie Tyler, Kate Bush and Sir Cliff even . . . well their star has ceased to twinkle. All been there and done that.

We’d have to ask Granduncle Rolf, at 82, if he really needs them.