John Gibson: Don’t catch the dengue in Porty!

Smug with it, you’ve been telling friends and neighbours you’ve got your summer hols all buttoned up. Passport in order, bikini and the Speedos fine for your kit bag.

You can hardly wait for your two weeks in that Portobello B&B. All you need to transform Porty into a shangri-la is the weather.

But even if the sun shines, what could ruin everything is the aedes albopictus. The what? The Asian tiger mosquito. It can transmit tropical diseases and having brought misery in parts of Italy, Spain and France it’s coming north with the climate change, bringing dengue fever with it.

Dear Folks, sun’s shining here in Porty but Bill’s poorly, down with what they call dengue fever.

Can it be true?

. . . that Cardinal Keith O’Brien is saying same-sex is just as immoral as slavery? Said it before and he’ll say it again. None of my business. Keith’s still a mate in my eyes.

. . . that I am seriously considering a creative writing course in Tuscany? Maybe I should. Then again maybe too late.

. . . that pensioners are being raped and pillaged by chancer Chancellor George Osborne and, in effect, by our Tory Prime Minister Call Me Dave Cameron? Indeed, yes.

. . . that the SNP, if voters were daft enough to empower them, would invest in home-grown TV shows? God spare us!