For calm reassurance over Covid, I listen to Nicola Sturgeon, not Boris Johnson, while humming, not singing, Land of Hope and Glory – Bill Jamieson

Bill Jamieson is weary of Boris Johnson’s U-turns about how to stay safe in the age of Covid

Bill Jamieson suggest humming Land of Hope and Glory, rather than singing the controversial words, as a source of solace during Covid (Picture: Guy Bell/PA Wire)

Seldom has the admonition ’Do not attempt this at home’ been more applicable than on the ever-changing advice about the coronavirus plague. The rules change almost every day.

Down south, face masks now have to be worn in school corridors where lockdown restrictions have been re-applied – this soon after government assurances that no such precautions would be necessary. Stay apart. Keep your distance. Meet the neighbours. Don’t meet the neighbours.

Sitting at home, I now wonder whether I should apply these restrictions here. Don a face mask when walking from my little office to the kitchen.

Between the desk and the sitting room is our cat, Poosie Nancie, the feisty feline from Fife who has no intention of moving to conform to any social distancing rules. And as I spend much of my time facing a laptop screen, should I not wear a plastic shield to avoid the risk of blow-back and infecting myself? The rule of thumb these days is to pay no attention to Prime Minster Boris and instead just follow Nicola, as it seems the Scottish Government is constantly one jump ahead on all the Covid precautions.

Today I opened the French windows and looked out to Loch Earn, its surface sparking like a treasure trove of diamonds in the morning sun. Mists curl round the shoulders of Ben Vorlich and in the field in front of the house, sheep peacefully graze, crows dart and a heron steps elegantly through the marsh grass.

What could be more calm-inducing and reassuring amid the Covid chaos than this scene? I feel like singing Land of Hope and Glory.

But on second thoughts, don the face mask and visor, retreat to the bottom of the garden, stick my head in a wheelie bin, avoid the words and just hum the tune – quietly.

Oh what it is to be safe, to stay alert, and be woke to this new world.

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