Take this deceptively simple multiple-choice test to receive some political wisdom – ahead of the expected Brexit-dominated general election – from Bill Jamieson.
Good morning voters! At last, the great Brexit general election may be coming at last!
But do we know what we’re voting for? Do we even know if the political parties know what they are standing for? Or what the range of outcomes may be?
Here’s your chance to test your knowledge before making that all-important cross on the ballot paper. Never let it be said after all those votes and debates in the House of Commons that you are not now crystal clear about all the implications ahead.
Confound the pollsters! Astonish your friends! Simply answer the questions below and tot up your score at the end. You’ll be the star performer at the Christmas Quiz!
1. Have you read:
(a) The 115-page EU Withdrawal Agreement Bill
(b) The Bill plus 122-page explanatory notes
(c) The two above plus the 12 further explanatory documents, fact sheets and briefing notes
(d) A newspaper summary
(e) Laura Kuenssberg’s bullet points
(f) None of the above
2. In the evenings do you:
a) Watch the Brexit coverage in full
b) Switch off after two minutes
c) Watch BBC Newsnight
d) Watch Robert Peston on ITV
e) Switch off when they appear
f) Switch off when Dominic Grieve, Tony Blair and Ian Blackford appear
3. Are you minded to vote for:
(a) A Remain-leaning Conservative
(b) A Brexit-leaning Conservative
(c) An independent Conservative
(d) Not sure as can’t tell the difference
(e) For a Remain-leaning Labour candidate
(f) A Brexit-leaning Labour candidate
(g) A referendum-supporting Labour candidate
(h) A re-negotiated Brexit-leaning Labour candidate
(i) Not sure what Labour stands for at all
4. If voting Lib Dem do you:
(a) Want another referendum
(b) Want to Remain
(c) Want votes at 16 and to stop global warming
5. If minded to vote SNP do you want:
(a) independence but to stay in the EU
(b) a separate currency
(c) to adopt the Euro as Scotland’s currency
(d) a hard border between England and Scotland
(e) A soft Scexit
6. You are minded to vote for the Brexit Party. But do you support:
(a) An immediate ‘clean break’ Brexit
(b) A delay and extension as advocated by Nigel Farage
7. If your candidate wins but then joins another party do you:
(a) Demand a by-election
(b) Want the candidate to be de-selected and replaced by the runner-up
(c) think the candidate is free to join any party he or she wants
(d) believe it’s for the courts to decide
8. You have booked on a round-the-world cruise ship. Do you:
(a) Demand a postal vote
(b) Ask for a ship-to-shore voting booth
(c) Request regular news coverage over the tannoy
(d) Insist the news is switched off and a blanket ban on the word ‘Brexit’
9. The election results in a hung parliament. Do you:
(a) Demand another vote
(b) Settle for a minority coalition
(c) Demand an open-ended Brexit extension
(d) Call for a People’s Vote
10. If the country remains divided with no evident resolution would you like to see:
(a) The break-up of the UK into four separate nations/kingdoms
(b) Brexit suspended sine die
(c) Parliament suspended until a clear referendum result is secured
(e) The Supreme Court to run the country
Scores: 1a= 5pts; 1b= 7; 1c= 10; 1d= 2; 1e= 1; 1f= 0.
2a= 10; 2b= 2; 2c= 5; 2d= 5; 2e= 0; 2f= 0.
3a= 2; 3b= 2; 3c= 2; 3d= 5; 3e= 2; 3f= 2; 3g= 2; 3h= 2; 3i= 5.
4a= 2; 4b= 5; 4c= 2.
5a= 2; 5b= 2; 5c= 2; 5d= 2; 5e= 1.
6a= 2; 6b= 2.
7a= 3; 7b= 2; 7c= 1; 7d= 1.
8a = 2; 8b= 2; 8c= 3; 8d= 1.
9a= 4; 9b= 2; 9c= 2; 9d= 2.
10a= 5; 10b= 3; 10c= 3; 10d= 2.
How you scored:
Score 30 plus: You are a Brexit whizz, up with Michel Barnier! You should almost certainly scoop the Christmas Brexit quiz.
However, the more you know, the more likely it is you may swither and change our mind.
Score 20-29: You are Brexit savvy but constant Commons debates and votes have started to wear you down.
Just “getting it done” may override your critical faculties.
Score 20-28: You are clinging on bravely but a full-throttle election may bring on Brexit Personality Disorder.
Score below 20: Book that world cruise and keep the radio switched off. You will have the holiday of a lifetime!