Janet Christie: She was talked out by “The Nice People”

THE bathroom is Occupied. Youngest’s lock-in protest tactic shows no sign of abating and I’m working on eviction. The boys veto lock removal for fear of being walked in on.

I tell them I’ve seen it before. In fact I grew their bits, but somehow this isn’t a comfort.

It’s not just our bathroom. At a book group weekend on Skye she didn’t want to end, while I packed she slipped off and locked herself in. Obviously I stormed up the stairs but other more patient types formed a human barricade and she was talked out by “The Nice People”.

Now it’s bedtime on her birthday. We’ve had a lovely time, special fish tea with the boys in a restaurant, but she’s “overtired” and decides to round off the day with a lock-in.

Right. My thoughts swing hammerward. But I don’t want the day I smash my way into the bathroom to be a birthday memory. I lie on my bed instead. She’ll soon come out. Especially since the light switch is on the outside, ha, ha. The glow from the hall will stop her being scared. Not that she ever is.

It’s been a long day … work, presents, cake, tears … No point arguing, just makes it worse … I drift off. When I wake she’s cuddled in to me, limpet like, smiling sweetly in her sleep.

I find I’m most effective when I do nothing at all.