Restaurant review: Steak, Edinburgh

Old chestnuts. This restaurant has fallen for one of them. The idea that men like steak more than women do.

At least that’s the impression I get when looking at their marketing material, such as the images on their website which, as well as being sexist and a bit seedy (there’s one of a girl poking her tongue out, bichon-frise style, while someone dangles a sirloin above her head). It appears to be designed to appeal to men only.

It put me off visiting this place, which has Jason Wright, former head chef at Edinburgh eatery Ondine, at its helm. I felt like I wasn’t invited.

But iron deficiency and curiosity got the better of me.

The space – part of the No.12 Picardy Place venue that consists of Restaurant Mark Greenaway, a cocktail bar and a boutique hotel – is huge, dimly lit and high-ceilinged. However, they’ve cleverly divided it with black wooden beams suspended by rope, and tall shelving units, decorated with trendy miscellanea, like sheep skulls and vintage suitcases.

The walls are smoky, the floor glossy, there is jazzy music on the sound system, and pillar candles on every table. It’s like a theatrical set.

When it comes to the grub, there are a couple of salads for the ladies. Ahem.

For starters, I went for the beef carpaccio (£8) and my eating partner, Rolf, chose beef shin (£7). Both were gorgeous. The latter was a Kilner jar full of buttery and musky shredded meat. On the side, three slices of crispy toasted onion bread and a little metal pan of red onion marmalade, which was beautifully spiced rather than screamingly sweet.

My option featured wafer-thin petals of crimson beef, interspersed with sheets of golden and magenta beetroot, topped by a drizzle of subtle lemony oil, some peppery cress and baby basil leaves. It tasted very delicate, with a melting texture. I practically breathed it in. Gone in ten seconds.

Although I wear the trousers (and, on weekends, lederhosen), I allowed Rolf to have the Black Isle rib-eye steak (£9 per 100g) for his main, which he decided on after the waitress visited our table to expertly showcase a board of cuts.

The steak here is priced by the 100g, with a minimum purchase of 250g and incremental rises of 100g, so be careful and do your maths.

My dining partner went for 350g (£31.50), which was perhaps more than he strictly needed. However, he scoffed the lot, as it was a loose fibred and irony tasting beast, with a chargrilled grill-lined surface.

This came with a pot of decent bearnaise sauce (you can also choose peppercorn or Stilton hollandaise), as well as a chunk of bone, the marrow of which appeared to have been blended with an earthy-looking mixture of milled mushrooms and shallot. Splendiferous, according to my dining partner.

While he troughed this, I set to task on my lamb cutlets (£16.50). There were three of these offerings, cooked rare, and soft as anything. They came with a swirl of fresh-tasting salsa verde, a small jug of minty gravy and a large, squishy potato rosti. All good, apart from the latter, which was as ridiculously salty as a sea dog.

Side dishes yoyo-ed. The truffled macaroni and cheese (£3) tasted of flour, not of fromage, while pickled carrots with star anise (£3) seemed to have been slicked with cider vinegar, rather than actually preserved (not zingy enough for me). Triple-cooked chips in beef dripping (£3) had a spongy, slightly flaccid texture, but were still pretty compulsive eating, thanks to their feral tinge.

The puddings weren’t quite right. Despite a soggy shortcrust case, my citrus meringue pie (£6) was pleasant, with its glossy lemon filling (although, I’m always disappointed when I anticipate solid meringue and get the squidgy Italian stuff). However, its accompanying orange sorbet was crunchy with ice crystals.

Rolf’s pudding – the pear and frangipani tart (£6) – had a gorgeously almondy pastry, but the fruit content was hard. Madagascan vanilla ice-cream was lovely, though.

This steakhouse is on the cusp of being great. It just needs to iron out a few niggles (for example, its sexist advertising material). Ironing. That’s a woman’s job isn’t it? Pah.

• Steak Edinburgh. No 12 Picardy Place, Edinburgh (0131 557 0952, www.steakedinburgh.com)

How much? Dinner for two, excluding drinks, £84