The Smarts: A good week for James Bond

IT’S STRANGE to think it now, but when it was first announced that Daniel Craig was to play James Bond, the news was widely greeted with hostility and derision.

Objectors even set up a website, www.craignotbond.com, moaning that a “short, blond actor with the rough face of a professional boxer and a penchant for playing killers, cranks, cads and gigolos” couldn’t possibly be a sensible choice for 007.

Those voices were, of course, quickly silenced once the game-changing Casino Royale was released (curiously and somewhat fittingly, www.Craignotbond.com now seems to have been taken over by Russians). And last week, Craig achieved something that no Bond – and in fact, no-one at all, ever – had done before: acted opposite the Queen. Beat that, Connery.

A week in which the country is still reeling from the sight of Her Majesty being escorted to the Olympics by a professional psychopath – sorry, I mean the world’s favourite secret agent – is, no doubt, the most opportune moment ever to unveil the first full trailer for a new James Bond film.

Luckily, Skyfall looks fantastic, although the trailer prompts many questions. Is Judi Dench’s departure from the role of M an opportunity for the Queen to step into the role? What is going on with Javier Bardem’s hair? How does Bond survive that fall from an absolutely gigantic railway bridge? (Through a conveniently placed plot hole, possibly.) What is going on with Javier Bardem’s HAIR? How does Bond survive that fall down a long neon corridor from Tron, and will he have turned into a computer game when he does? Is it written into Daniel Craig’s contract that he must appear in his swimming trunks at least once? WHAT IS GOING ON WITH JAVIER BARDEM’S HAIR?