Burst Baw: The Funniest Football Player Names in History - Part Two

Published on Thursday 11 March 2010 12:49

WELCOME to the second part of our incredibly juvenile 'Funniest Football Player Names in History'. Stars of part one Fanni and Bandeet have been replaced by such footballing greats as Booty and Arce. Feel feel to add you own particular favourites for the upcoming third installment unless you are easily offended - in that case you should probably look away now.

Norman Conquest

The Australian international goalkeeper is a legend in football circles down under thanks to his performances for the national team in the 1950s.

The Aussies hold Norman in such high regard that he was posthumously inducted into the Australian Football Federation's Hall of Fame in 2002.

Argelico Fucks

Known in Brazilian footballing circles simply as 'Argel', Fucks spent a large part of his career playing in Portugal with Benfica.

He retired from the game in 2007 and is now manager with Brazilian outfit Campinense Clube

Milan Fukal

The Czech Republic international was a one-time target for Leeds United but has spent much of his career in Germany with Hamburg and Borussia Mnchengladbach.

He now plies his trade with Austrian side Kapfenberger.

Martyn Booty

Booty is a journey-man pro of England's lower leagues having played for Coventry City, Crewe Alexandra, Reading, Southend United, Chesterfield and Huddersfield Town.

His last playing role was with non-league Buxton in 2008/09 before being appointed assistant manager of Northern Premier League Division One side Curzon Ashton.

Mirko Dickhaut

Defensive midfielder Dickhaut spent his entire club career in Germany and now manages KSV Hessen Kassel who play in the fourth tier of German football.

Gilles Yapi Yapo

The Ivory Coast international currently plays for Swiss side BSC Young Boys.

Ricardo Faty

Hailed in the French press as the next Patrick Viera, Faty is owned by AS Roma but is currently on loan at FC Nantes.

He has a younger brother, Jacques Faty, who plays for French Ligue 1 side FC Sochaux-Montbliard.

Francisco Arce

Francisco Javier Arce Roln played 61 times for the Paraguayan national side.

Hilariously, his nickname is "Chiqui" Arce.

Segar Bastard

Bastard was an English amateur football player and referee between 1854 and 1921.

Born in London, his only cap came when Scotland trounced England 5 - 4 in 1880.

Roberto Lopez Ufarte

Ufarte played out much of his professional career at Spanish side Real Sociedad where he is now a coach.

The dependable striker, who scored 112 goals in 412 career appearances, retired in 1990 at the age of 31 while playing for Real Betis.

Bongo Christ

The Congolese international is another journey-man pro that makes our line-up having played for a host of European teams including SV Wilhelmshaven, Hannover 96, Gazlec Ajaccio, FC Aarau, FC Schaffhausen, FC Solothurn, FC Thun and FC 105 Libreville.

Bongo headed back to Africa in 2004 and was last spotted in 2008 in Angola playing for Sporting Cabinda

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