TV review: Deborah 13: Servant of God

Published on Tuesday 10 March 2009 18:45

Deborah 13: Servant of God, BBC3

FAR BE it from me to commit the cardinal sin of writing a pre-emptive review, but even before I had started watching Deborah 13: Servant of God, I'd already scribbled a two-word assessment in my notebook: "infuriating, depressing". Why so presumptuous? Because Deborah, the subject of this documentary, is a fundamentalist Christian, hence my remarkably accurate prediction of what to expect.

Linda Bruscasco's sobering film began with Deborah and her younger sister (there are ten children in the family in total: Mum and Dad busy obeying God's bidding there) staring in incomprehension at a copy of Closer magazine.

Having been almost completely shut off from the outside world their entire lives, neither of them had heard of Victoria Beckham or Britney Spears. Without television, they wouldn't even know what BBC3 – makers of Snog? Marry? Avoid?, F*** Off, I'm a Hairy Woman and now this – was. That, I would imagine, must be the only upside of being a Christian fundamentalist.

Sadly, Deborah's ignorance ran far deeper than that. Intelligent and articulate, she was obviously well educated in certain respects (naturally, the children are home-schooled). But she also possessed the kind of arrogant intransigence and pitifully nave world view so typical of the stubbornly devout.

In Deborah's brainwashed mind, those who blaspheme and tell white lies are as sinful as murderers and paedophiles. And anyone who doesn't accept her definition of God's word into their hearts is going straight to hell, a concept she seemed worryingly obsessed with.

When she isn't dropping off to sleep while listening to creationist sermons – lest she spend a single moment of her life without absorbing gibberish – Deborah likes nothing better than taking to the streets to spread God's delightful message of judgment and damnation.

This appears to consist of wandering up to groups of teenagers and insulting them, a move so counterproductive she might as well have walked around with a placard reading "Hail Satan!".

Disproving the Daily Mail notion that all teenagers are antisocial horrors, the drinking, smoking, fornicating kids that Deborah met were unfailingly polite and tolerant. The courtesy they extended to her was not returned, however, as Deborah casually informed them that they were on a fast track to eternal purgatory.

"I don't mind offending someone if they're saved for eternity," she shrugged. That's the wonderful thing about Christian fundamentalism: it's so charitable and open-minded.

I had to keep reminding myself that it wasn't Deborah's fault that she was like this. Her parents – both clearly terrified of the outside world, like Tubbs and Edward from The League of Gentlemen – may love their children very much, but the psychological damage they've inflicted upon them is probably beyond repair.

Pathetically desperate to convert everyone else to their insane way of thinking, the family regularly perform an entirely Bible-themed puppet show at a nearby holiday camp. Puppets are useful, opined Mum, as they can help you get away with saying things that might otherwise be deemed controversial.

Nevertheless, at least one woman was rightly appalled that her children had been inadvertently subjected to some Muppets telling them they were going to burn in Hell. The show presumably wasn't advertised as containing a fundamentalist Christian message. Funny that.

So why did Deborah's parents agree to allow cameras into their world? What did they hope to gain from the experience? Money? Because otherwise they have – once again – presented their children as pitiable objects of ridicule. They won't see that, of course. Forgive them Lord, they know not what they've done.