Terrified by a tourist's camera? Snap out of it

Published on Tuesday 29 April 2008 09:30

MEMBERS of the public – of which I am one – have their uses when it comes to tackling Osama Bin Laden and/or child pornography. Nothing gives me a greater thrill than the thought of being a front-line foot soldier against the evil forces of international terrorism and paedophilia.

In the old days, this might have required joining the army or erecting a Stop And Search Barrier around the nearest swing park. Now all I need to do is find someone with a camera and point them out to the police. Given how many of these photographic ne'er-do-wells one finds lurking all over Edinburgh, many of whom are also clearly foreigners, it can only be a matter of time before I help avert a "major incident" and/or ruin someone's holiday.

Taking photographs has become a suspicious thing to do in the UK. One man was ordered by police to delete his photographs after being "caught" taking pictures of ex-Eastender Letitia Dean turning on the Christmas lights in Ipswich, and not because the policeman in question felt that the photographs might one day be used as evidence of an incredibly dull life. As you may know, there are posters all over the London Underground warning about the dangers of photography and what these so-called photographers might be up to.

Most of these people are up to nothing more or less than bad photography and it would be amusing indeed if the police were stopping them on grounds of good taste. "Excuse me, sir, but getting your chum to stand on the North Bridge side-on with his mouth wide open in a manner that suggests he is eating Edinburgh Castle has been done many times; go snap one of Greyfriars Bobby sitting on his head – far less common."

Much is made of the phrase "letting the terrorists win". If "stopping the terrorists" means that everyday activities like photography become a minefield of legal interpretation, then not only have the terrorists won, they are dancing a jig on the grave of our ordinary freedoms. Not to say sounding a death-knell for tourists – who wants to come here and not take photographs?

Could the Scottish Parliament possibly take it upon itself to announce that rather than walking down the same duff route as our southern brethren, we will instead embrace the concept that the best defence of an open society is openness and that our people are to be trusted until proven otherwise? Or should we wave goodbye to these most normal of things? And our tourists?

Amy the scapegoat

Some people are a bit too excited about Amy Winehouse. If she wasn't a popular singer/songwriter, Winehouse's antics would not stand out from those of the army of drunk slappers that inundate our streets after dark.

Am I wrong in detecting a bit of sexism here? There have been plenty of male celebrities whose rabble-rousing lifestyle has been simply laughed off as part of their endearing character.

Those in Scotland expressing their concern at Winehouse's admittedly unfortunate demeanour after one of her regular benders would be better off getting concerned and actually doing something about those in their own lives who could do with some help. As such, Amy Winehouse isn't a bad role model; she's a convenient distraction from home truths.

Self-policing adds up

Enabling the Lothian Chief Constable to be part of his own assessment is both wise and welcome. Yes, he's paid a lot more than the average. Is his job even remotely similar to the average? No. How do you think his salary compares to some of those currently engaged in mid-table mediocrity "battle" – I use the word advisedly – for either Hibs or Hearts?

Better policing doesn't happen by itself. If making the millions of pounds spent on policing work harder costs less than half a police car, then what's the big deal? Ideal, no; effective? Let's see.