Straight from the Norse's mouth

Published on Monday 12 September 2005 01:21

THE Viking influence on our native tongue elicited quite a response from readers.

Thanks to Iain Johnstone's research, we discovered the origin of the location of Ricky Demarco's five-star archive exhibition. Skateraw, near Dunbar, is old Norse for s***hole. But local historian Johnstone could be creating an even bigger stink, as he tells us his research reveals, "our Scots non-Gaelic tongue does not come from Old English as claimed by our 'Scots' dictionaries but old Norse".

Iain has completed his second book on place names, Viking Place Names of East Lothian (Tarmagan), covering a six-mile radius of Dunpelder/Traprain Law.

His other book covers all of Scotland, including Auld Reekie, which is derived from Ald Reykja, like Reykjavik in Iceland. Ald Reykja was also referred to as Edinaborg in the Sagas. Colinton - Colbanestoun in the 14th century - comes from Kollbeinn, which was adapted by the Norse from the Irish, Columba.

To return to the scatological tone of Skateraw, we learn Wolfstar, in East Lothian, may sound mysterious, but early 13th-century forms showed it as Fuylstrother, which is Norse, Fll, "foul, stinking", and strr, (pronounced strother) "covered in straw", describing an old East Lothian byre. Where did the Wolf come from? Well, metathesis is a common linguistic phenomenon, whereby certain letters are transposed. In this instance, Fll, became lf, "a wolf", and strr, became a "star".

In case East Lothian feels picked on, Iain tells us Danderhall, in Midlothian, is probably Old Norse for evil-smelling hillside.

• www.scotsplacenames.com

AS THE Stand comedy club celebrates its tenth anniversary this week, the Dove Naked Truth Comedy Tour will be stopping off at their Glasgow gaff, hosted by Arabella "does my bum look big in this" Weir of The Fast Show fame. But missing from this part of the UK tour will be Lovely Lucy Porter.

We are concerned she may be giving the Caledonian comedy circuit a miss after having her "happy" bubble burst during the Fringe, not so much by Scotland as by The Scotsman.

Her show, Happiness - about the joys of being happy - came under the slightly sceptical eye of our wannabe Calvinist Roger Cox, who suggested to her during their eight-hour bender (supposedly interviewing her) nobody could be that happy. Lucy confessed later she had introduced some existential angst to the show, which could be down to her hangover or Roger's words of wisdom.

Meantime, Lucy said she thought children would make her happy but after seeing what they'd done to friends, she will stick to smoking, sex and porn.

Will Belinda's husband pop up too?

IS THERE no stopping the cashmere queen? She is launching her Belinda Robertson Cashmere Wash which will be available in about 500 Tesco stores nationwide this autumn. Until now, it has been available only at stores in Edinburgh and London as well as on the website.

But can we expect her husband, the lawyer Alastair Dickson, to follow suit with a range of toasters? As part of his divorce settlement with his previous wife, he returned to the family home to secure the toaster as part of the deal.

Just as Belinda says, "This unique formula will keep your cashmere in top condition without the time consuming expense of dry cleaning", so Alastair could say his toaster does not burn your bread - unlike legal advice.

It seems they're going off the rails already

WITH Edinburgh now seriously discussing the reintroduction of trams, business liaison committees have been consulting with the city's entrepreneurs to see if they are "fir or agin it".

Someone in Sunny Leith asked when the first one would run and the committee's answer has to be applauded for its honesty. "At present, it is anticipated the first tram will run late in 2009."

You don't say. It's called getting your excuses in, if not first, at least early.