Snapshots of the highs and woes . .

Published on Friday 30 August 2002 01:00

THE phone is ringing, the pot on the stove is bubbling over, the washing is piling up and junior has just decided you simply must come and see his latest Lego creation.

Every mum, and some dads too, will recognise the scene - often accompanied by the horrific discovery that your little angel has just decorated hall walls in black crayon - and the accompanying feeling that this time, surely your head really will explode.

These are the joys of parenthood that the baby books conveniently forget to mention and which only other parents can fully appreciate.

Such as the supermarket trip which turns into a battle of wills in the cereal aisle, the bottomless laundry basket and the feeling that you are sometimes living in Edvard Munch’s nightmarish painting, The Scream.

Indeed, that screaming figure might not be too out of place in a new photographic exhibition, created by mums and dads who are only too familiar with the highs and lows of parenthood.

Organised by Broxburn Family and Community Development Centre, ‘Transparent’, is a quirky, entertaining and often thought-provoking series of photographs, which will have every hardworking, stressed-out parent with a young child nodding in appreciation.

"The aim of the project was to make images which show the realities of being a parent of young children - to tell the often hidden story of parenting, the good the bad and the ugly," explains project co-ordinator Tansy Lee Moir. "The results are fantastic - and all the more remarkable when you think that they have been done by people who have no previous experience of this kind of photography."

Among the striking images, which have just gone on show at Livingston’s Howden Park Centre, is one depicting a woman’s head, digitally enlarged to show it bursting with thoughts of mealtimes, playtimes and washing-up. Another shows a young mum’s remarkable balancing act as she sways on one leg while holding a pile of ironing, dirty dishes, a bin full of nappies and her twin sons.

That same mum, Cristina Kean, depicts herself in another photograph trying to talk on the phone, with two demanding toddlers at her feet, the kitchen strewn with debris and dream bubbles which reveal her yearning for a little time off for herself.

It’s not all bad, insists Cristina with a smile, but there are times when she does feel she is living the life of one of her exhibition images.

"You go to university, you get a degree, get pregnant and read all the books about having kids, but you are never prepared until you actually have them," she says. "You just don’t realise how much hard work it all is."

Originally from Brazil where she worked as a civil engineer, Cristina’s life took a dramatic change when she came here on holiday and met her husband, Gavin. Their twins, Gabriel and Sereno, are now two-years-old, and Cristina is juggling motherhood with keeping a house and working part-time.

"I want to show in the photographs how having a family is a constant balancing act, you are juggling your job, your husband, housework and the kids. At the same time, there are things you wish you had time to do for yourself - like relaxing and de-stressing," she says. "The worst thing about parenting is that people don’t realise the work that it involves, it’s seen as a second-class job, it’s not like being a dentist or a teacher.

"Being a mum isn’t regarded as being very much. But people forget how hard it is when you are trying to stay alert but haven’t had any sleep, and the sheer mental strain of never being able to switch off."

Having seen four children into adulthood, Shirley Rollo, 40, probably should have been enjoying the chance to switch off from parenthood - instead she is playing mum second time around, caring for adopted four-year-old, Dylan.

She illustrates the burden of motherhood in her photograph, in which she is seen bent almost double, Dylan loaded onto her back and with a saintly halo hovering above her head.

The background is a series of words written in childish scribbles: "Nurse", "Cleaner", "Juggler" and "Cook".

Another of her images shows her playfully pretending to throttle her mischievous son as he seems determined to poke his own eyes out with his toys.

"He is actually an adorable little boy and quite angelic, but every parent knows that there are times when they push you to breaking point," she laughs. "Of course it’s incredibly hard work, but being a parent is also so rewarding."

Shirley had already raised two teenagers, Mark and Hayley, by herself when she met single dad John and his daughters Sonia and Kirsty. With their family grown, they jumped at the chance to adopt Dylan.

Shirley says: "John was a single dad for eight years so he knows how hard it is bring up children. And now I’ve seen it from both sides. I was a working mum when Mark and Hayley were young - I had no choice - and I missed out on so much, but now I’ve stopped work to be a full-time mum for Dylan and while it’s sometimes tough, I wouldn’t have changed it."

Respite from the demands of parenthood is provided by Broxburn Family and Community Development Centre, which has provided parents with access to workshops, activities and adult education. It has grown from having just two members of staff in 1989 to employing around 20 today, operating from three sites and it has a turnover in excess of 200,000. Today it provides a raft of services from a purpose-built adventure playground for children and out of school care provision to vocation training and contraceptive advice for parents.

Tansy says the Centre’s photographic project - funded by West Lothian Council’s Arts Unit and West Lothian Social Inclusion Partnership - has enabled parents to not only learn about traditional and digital photography but also to express their ideas and feelings.

She adds: "We wanted a way to get people involved in using computers and in taking photographs which weren’t ordinary family snaps.

"The results are extremely good - I think most parents will be able to identify with them."

Transparent runs at Howden Park Centre in Livingston until September 25. Entry is free.