Off the map

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I wonder if anyone can help with a couple of place names that were used on BBC news ­programmes in the last few days. Despite my best efforts, I have been unable to find them on any map. I mean “Cayngoms” and “Lock Ness”, although I guess that the latter must be somewhere on the Caledonian Canal.

In addition to those, and away from place names, we had “tawchuh” on Sunday and “owuh” on Monday morning, not helped by David Cameron in India speaking about “British shures”.

I have noticed in the past that “Wales” is not necessarily a country but can be large sea creatures and “wear” is not something you do with clothes but instead ­frequently relates to place.

Finally, it now seems necessary to add an “r’” at the end of many words, such as “sawr”.

This is all very confusing and 
I do hope someone can help.

Alistair McEwen

Cramond Brig Toll