I'm positively in need of some sunshine - Janet Christie's Mum's the Word

We’re all agreed, Scotland’s beautiful, right? But is it wrong to crave a little sunshine in your life?
Mum's the WordMum's the Word
Mum's the Word

Since Covid I’ve walked the perimeter of Fife and a third of the John Muir Way so far, and Country Girl and I are debating The West Highland Way or The Great Glen, but who doesn’t want a little warmth? The only time my T-shirts see any action these days is when I’m painting and I can’t even remember where the bikini I keep for sunbathing is stashed. Probably perished under the bed. Or smothered by the burkini affair I wear for (not wild, just outdoors) swimming in the North Sea. And I’m not borrowing one of Youngest’s designer postage stamps joined by cheesewire offerings.

“What’s a postage stamp?” says Youngest Child.

“Those sticky picture things you buy at the post office when you send a letter or return something.”

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“Oh. But you do that for me when you make me do thank you letters because I don’t know how that works. And when I’m returning shopping I don’t go to the post office, I just go to the shop and they swipe the thingy. Stamps, hmmm. Right. Anyway, there’s nothing wrong with my bikinis.”

She has multiple, all so teeny-tiny that even piled up on her bedroom floor it looks like Barbie’s had all her mates round for a pool party that got out of hand.

“Your problem,” she says, “is self-loathing and negative self-talk and I’ve told you before we’re not having any of that in THOS house.”

“But…”

“No. Just no. Na-ha.”

I was going to agree with her, and OK maybe have a little whine because relentless positivity can make you feel and sound like you’ve had a lobotomy, but my protest dies on the lips, or hips in this case. I make do with a snipey: “What’s Na-ha? I hate Americanisms.”

“Hate?”

Grrr.

The swimwear discussion is the result of my throwing caution to the wind, or Eunice, and booking flights for a holiday that’s been cancelled for the last three years. A week in Spain, with Country Girl and gang and it might, well maybe, actually happen.

So starved of sunshine are we that Youngest has not once said it’ll be boring or she’d rather go somewhere with her pals.

“A pool! Sunshine! Spain! Mother/daughter bonding time!” she trills.

It’s unnerving. I pity today’s youth. Look what Covid’s done to them.

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Youngest Child has self-assembly nailed - Janet Christie's Mum's the Word

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