Need some Burns Night inspiration?

By LINDSEY JOHNSTONE
Published on Tuesday 24 January 2012 02:22

Raise a toast to Scotland’s favourite son at the Balmoral Bar with a menu of Scottish-inspired cocktails made from Glenmorangie single malt.

We like the sound of The Grape and Glen, a light and fresh mix of Glenmorangie, pinot grigio, cucumber and lemon. – a whisky cocktail for those wary of whisky. But the real highlight and most indulgent form of tribute has to be The Big Yin; three shots of Signet, Glenmorangie’s richest whisky, with brown sugar and orange zest on the rocks, and a dark chocolate and orange bitters finish. Balmoral Hotel

Rabbie Burns would have made a cracking stand-up, so what more appropriate way to honour him than a night of comedy at The Stand? In Edinburgh, join Joe Heenan, whose writing credits include Chewing the Fat; and Fred Macaulay Show alumnus Susan Morrison. And over in Glasgow, the caustic Vladimir McTavish and BBC Radio 4 regular Susan Calman take to the stage in the Bard’s name. 25 January, The Stand, Edinburgh and Glasgow, 8.30pm, £8. The Stand

The Bard had a lot of love for the ladies, so unique Edinburgh event Rabbie’s Girls, billed as a lively Burns evening just for the lassies, seems only fitting. Hosted by Karen Dunbar, in aid of charity Royal Blind, the night kicks off with champagne and oysters and carries on through a five-course tasting menu, traditional Burns Night speeches with a feminine twist, a raffle and an auction. We can’t think of any place Burns would rather have been than a room full of women and wine. 27 January, George Hotel Edinburgh, 6.30pm, £69 per ticket or £690 for a table of ten. Click here for details.

Not a Rabbie Burns fan? Then what are your thoughts on his fellow countryman poet William McGonagall? Widely regarded as Britain’s worst published poet, his readings of his poetry were regarded (possibly with irony) as a form of Music Hall-style comic entertainment, making him the forefather of many an unintentionally dire coffee shop poet. This month Auchentoshan whisky presents an alternative to Burns night, The William McGonagall Supper. In honour of McGonagall’s somewhat backwards poetry skills, pudding will be served first, followed by main course and then starter. Guests should wear something tweed, a hat and moustache – yes, even the ladies. When a speaker shouts “McGonagall!”, all guests must stand and tip their hats to the top table in respect to the wayward poet. Adventurous speakers are fully encouraged to write their own poems in McGonagall’s style, and the writer of the worst effort will receive an old boot for their trouble. 25 January, 7.30pm, Hyde Out, £25, 2 Fountainbridge Square. See here for details.

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