John Gibson: Here's ma hat, where's ma coat?

Published on Thursday 10 December 2009 08:38

DON'T ever forget. It was Mahatma Gandhi who uttered for posterity: "You may never know what results come from your actions. But if you do nothing, there will be no result." Eh? I concur wholeheartedly with his every word. Like I always say, anywhere ah hang ma hat is home.

Somebody on eBay the other day claimed to have a pair of Gandhi's slippers (size 14) for sale. Not for me. I'd bid, rather, for one of his loin cloths (essentially dry cleaned).

Old Gandhi loved a shandy, like Churchill adored a cigar. But they hated each other's guts. They stopped exchanging Christmas cards after 1947. You read it here first. This column's an education in itself.

What a gem

Michael Laing, esteemed jeweller of Frederick Street, was in sparkling fettle co-sponsoring, with tailors Brooks Brothers, a Christmas shopping night round the corner in George Street.

He had launched a few weeks earlier Cardiff's largest jeweller. He already has a stake in the largest jeweller on the south coast in Southampton, where he owns ten per cent of the local football club.

Southampton FC has been bought by a mega rich businessman from abroad.

An industrious sort, Mr Laing tells me that, strangely, watch boxes are the new fad with likely lads in their thirties and forties.

Mr Laing habitually takes time out to play. "I'm getting away from it all late December to a little strip of sand off Thailand, with a beach and a bar and a pile of paperbacks. And my wife, of course."

Carry your bags, Michael?

Needled by Beeb

The sadists. The BBC keep taking sadistic delight in showing, up close, needles puncturing the arms of toddlers cradled by their mums and, nine out of ten, they proceed to cry.

You sadists, don't you realise this can put mothers off taking their offspring to the medics. And other toddlers, seeing this on screen, get scared stiff.

Afterwords . .

. . . Art for art's sake. But, for God's sake, they've gone and given the 25,000 Turner Prize to another right load of pretentious arty-farty tosh. We have the economic meltdown but there's still loadsamoney to burn out there.