John Gibson: Don't forget to take the clubs, Willy

Published on Wednesday 8 September 2010 10:00

ALWAYS the smile. Unfailingly upbeat. The Caledonian's general manager Swiss Willy Blattner slipped me a slab of Toblerone, like a Scot would slip you a piece shortbread, and told me to relax and be happy.

Just like him. He can well afford to be Mister Happy. The hotel's occupancy is significantly up on last summer. Christmas already is looking good.

Willy was recently back from a break in the Big Apple. Wife Pam is a native New Yorker and they're Florida-bound next month. A member at Pumpherston, he'll be taking his clubs. If it's not Pumpherston, it's Pebble Beach.

It Revs him up

Never mind what your doc says, see here what the Reverend Ian Paisley recommends. A glass of cider vinegar with some honey in it every morning.

That's worked for the firebrand who has reached 84 and is still shouting the odds. Cider is about to treble in price. Will he still be able to afford it?

Rumour has it that the Rev will be coming to Edinburgh for the Pope's visit.

Be aware, you could be standing next to him on the kerb in Princes Street at the pontiff's passing. You might even be offered a slug of his cidery potion.

No peace yet

How do you deal with the cult of celebrity that has grown around you?

Well, it does become increasingly difficult with the advancing years.

More so when I'm trauchling down Easter Road or when hailed by a passer-by en route to Lidl for the week's victuals.

The German-owned chain provides "bargains" by way of reparations. For some of us, the war isn't over.

Afterwords . .

. . . uttered by slavering Stallone from his family Beverly Hills home: "I consider my life ten per cent on target and 90 per cent mistakes. Everything in the house is female. The toys, the housekeeper, all the dogs. The one dog I have that's male is neutered. I'm next."

Sly, you can borrow my garden shears.