Freaky hair, garish frocks and neighbourly voting, it's time to tune in to Eurovision once again

Published on Wednesday 13 May 2009 18:57

WANDER along any of Moscow's main thoroughfares at the moment, and it's impossible not to notice the plethora of billboards featuring the beaming face of reigning Miss World, 21-year-old Ksenia Sukhinova, sporting a variety of hairstyles designed to represent each of the 42 participating nations in this year's Eurovision Song Contest.

Europe's largest city, the former heart of Communism – which boasts 444 museums, 132 cinemas and no fewer than 120 theatres and concert halls – has flung its arms wide open to welcome more than 4,000 delegates for this year's ber-camp fest.

Following the rapid expulsion of Georgia from the contest earlier this year for selecting a song provocatively entitled We Don't Wanna Put In, it's perhaps unsurprising that Russia's Prime Minister, Vladimir Putin, has taken a personal hand in ensuring that the facilities and courtesies extended to delegates in the 20,000 seater Olympiysky arena are second to none.

As ever, the variety, and indeed quality, of this year's entrants is as diverse as ever. We have an Elvis impersonator from Belgium doing battle with a mezzo-soprano from Sweden, whilst a very different war is raging in the Balkans, where a string quartet from Slovenia takes on a song about a shoe from Serbia.

The favourite to win the contest is 23-year-old Alexander Ryback from Norway. He's a fiddle-playing minstrel who looks like a cross between Harry Potter and a troll. His folksy Fairytale is an up-tempo celebration of young love gone wrong and features all the right elements to ensure big points from the ever-fickle national juries. Not only does he play the violin whilst cheekily sticking out his tongue, but he has the all-important vote grabber – an acrobatic male dance troupe – who flick and flip their way through the performance with tremendous gusto.

"A few years ago I decided to travel, and I earned my bed and board by knocking on the doors of strangers and offering to play my fiddle for them," an enthusiastic Ryback told the assembled press. Whether his visit into the homes of several hundred million viewers will pay a similar dividend will become apparent, but bookies around Europe have taken a bucketload of money on the effervescent Norwegian and all the indications are that this is the one to beat.

In complete contrast to our fresh faced Nordic friend, this year's Ukrainian participant, 26-year-old Svetlana Loboda, is a self proclaimed "Anti-Crisis Girl" who intends to single handedly solve the woes brought about by the worldwide economic crisis through her own brand of overtly sexual and completely frenetic pop!

Her promotional literature looks like the centre pages from a lads'-mag and tells us that Svettie (as she's been affectionately christened by the press) has "energy, sexuality and individuality". We are reliably informed that "she is able to cope with any situations using physical and psychological virtue by resisting evil in her desire to save the world."

Svettie is not a lady to be messed with. She means business.

Not only will she perform her song by pole-dancing her way scantily dressed over a bizarre circular climbing frame which she calls her "Hell Machine", but she will be accompanied on stage by that all-important vote grabber, an acrobatic male dance troupe.

Of course, our own record in Eurovision of late has been, to put it bluntly, abysmal. Long gone are the days when UK viewers could comfortably tune in knowing that whatever ABBA clone song we'd sent, we'd be up there in the Top 5 (usually second).

That's all set to change this year as we play our trump card – Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber! Fresh from his recent successes in recruiting a Maria and a Joseph, it was perhaps his success last year in finding a Nancy that first lead the BBC to think that he'd be the right man for Eurovision.

Enter stage-right Miss Jade Ewen. Her powerful rendition of the Lord's show-stopping ballad, It's My Time, co-written by Grammy award-winning American songwriter Diane Warren, has all theingredients of a classic Euro chanson – big notes, big key change and (of course) big hair.

Of course, there is a high degree of familiarity in all the performances. We know what we are getting, and that's why we all still love to switch on, sit back, and guffaw in sheer amazement at the whacky presenters, garish frocks, freaky hair-do's, neighbourly voting and, of course, those fabulous songs.

&#149 The final of this year's Eurovision Song Contest will be broadcast on BBC1 (and on BBC HD) on Saturday at 8pm.